Maelstrom Effect
by TomBAuthor93
Summary: After Shepard botches Zaeed's revenge, the merc backs out. In his place, he offers the skills of a known man that is 'just as good' as the former Blue Sun. Naruto, a man that survived the oldest Rachni invasion of Earth and might be the key to save it.Nx?
1. Chapter 1

A twenty-five year old spikey blonde haired man walked onto the shuttle that stood before him. He was wearing shinobi slacks, black sandals, a white shirt, an unzipped green flak jacket and a red cloak with black flames adoring the rims over it. He had cerulean blue eyes and whiskered cheeks to go along with his fox-like build. Around his neck was a small fox necklace that was dark red with two blue gems for the eyes on the fox head medallion, the necklace being a gift from his friend Yamanaka Ino before she passed away in the war. In his hand was a small scroll with the rest of his belongings. He turned back and looked at the few people watching him leave.

His student, Yuuhi Hiruzen, the son of Sarutobi Asuma and Yuuhi Kurenai, stood with tears brimming along his red eyes. He had taken the boy under his wing after his team sensei, Nara Shikamaru, died in the Second Shinobi Alliance War. He was dressed in a pair of black slacks and a blue Konoha shirt with the honorary Uzumaki symbol on the shoulders. Hanging across his chest was the Toad Summoning contract left to him by the current Gama Sennin. The blonde nodded to him, making it too much for the young ten year old to handle and he turned to bury his face in his mother's side.

Yuuhi Kurenai watched the former love interest of her favored student with a sad smile as she comforted her son and tears rolled down her face. Hyuuga Hinata would have fought tooth and nail against the Nanadaime Hokage's decision to send the Hero of Konoha away, but ever since the end of the Fifth Shinobi Alliance War, the corrupted Hokage had become afraid of the blonde's stance in the village, hence the banishment to a new life that was happening today. The shuttle he was boarding was of Hoshigakure no Sato design, a cryogenic stasis pod built in by the scientists of Yuki no Kuni, and sealed by the remaining members of the Fuuma clan to reduce interference by the blonde's demonic aura.

The blonde man then looked at his best friend and Chief Medical Officer of Konohagakure no Sato, Haruno Sakura. The pink haired medic was dressed in a ceremonial black and white yakuta like one of her mentors, Shizune, used to wear. A single tear trailed down her cheek and she smiled sadly at him as he started to leave. She was one of the few among the council that fought for his right to stay. She comforted the other two students of the blonde, Yamanaka Hinata and Nara Gaara (both named after fallen heroes known by their parents), that were sobbing their eyes out at his leaving. First they lost their sensei, in Gaara's case his father, and now they were losing their second mentor because of the corrupt village leader.

The blonde then looked ahead and sighed as he entered the shuttle forged from technology unearthed in Iwagakure. This would be the first and only mission to space that the Elemental Nations would ever have, as decided by the Council of Kages (not unanimously). With a final wave goodbye to the small gathered group, he boarded the shuttle, smiling as he heard Hiruzen call out, "I'll make this right sensei! You'll see! I'll be the next Hokage and bring you back!"

The blonde chuckled as the door shut behind him, his laughter turning into hushed sobs. The ship came alive thanks to the built in computer that took up almost three fourths of the ship's contents, the cryogenic pod being the only other thing in the shuttle. The blonde man pulled the black headband from his head, a gleam of metal with the carved image of a leaf looking back at him. With a few more tears, the blonde clutched the headband tightly before turning back to the door, opening it quickly and tossing the headband out before shutting it, none of those who were watching any wiser about his action. He looked at the scroll in his hand and looked around before finding a small storage panel, which he then used to store the scroll and a small package of farewell letters written to him by his friends. The blonde went to the cryogenic pod, looking at his reflection in the glass as his blonde bangs fell over his head.

"I'm sorry, mother, father," he said quietly to no one, "I...let you down. I'm not worthy to go by the name Uzumaki-Namikaze. To honor you though, I will keep my name you chose from Ero-sensei's book. I am an Uzumaki-Namikaze no longer."

With a determined look on his face, his eyes flashing red briefly, the blonde opened the cryogenic pod and entered it, settling himself in. As it was programmed, the cryogenic pod flash froze the blonde as it took off.

**The story doesn't end here however, for our now frozen hero has triggered events that will affect the entire Milky Way Galaxy for eons to come. These events would start reacting almost seventeen hundred years later, where the entire universe would have just began a war with the biggest threat they would face. These events would be called...**

**MALESTROM EFFECT**

**(Disclaimer: I own nothing aside from my plot and my own depiction of Shepard. PS, some important times may be wrong, just inform me and I'll fix them. THANKS!)**

* * *

><p><strong>Norse Head Nebula, 1659 years later (Year 2179)<strong>

The Human Alliance ship, _Daytona, _a B-class cruiser, drifted lazily around the planet the Human species deemed their home world, Earth. Second Class Flight Lieutenant James Jackson, JJ for short, yawned as he checked the systems on the drifting cruiser. He was an average height for a human male that was barely through his twenties, a solid six feet and two inches, with hardly any body fat on him whatsoever. He was lanky, though, his lithe muscles only being from keeping in regulated health. He had small brown freckles decorating his nose and cheeks, accenting his dark blue eyes and dusty blonde hair that he wore in the standard crew cut.

"I hate the night shift," JJ grumbled as he leaned back in the pilot's chair, "Nothing exciting ever happens...well I could always listen to some Asari music."

No sooner did the words leave his lips did the alarms start to go off, the sensors picking up an unknown object on radar. JJ blinked before reaching for the com and flipping it on.

"Captain, we have an unidentified object heading our way," he informed the CO, Captain David Anderson. The thirty-five year old Captain rushed to the cockpit and leaned over JJ's shoulder.

"What's the distance and telemetry of the UO?" Anderson asked with narrowed eyes locked on the radar.

"222.4 meters and visibility will be established out the starboard window in five...four...three...two..." JJ counted down as he and the Captain looked to their right, "What the hell...?"

"I think...it's a ship..." Anderson said with wide eyes as they looked at the bastardized contraption resembling a highly advanced escape pod, "Bring it in, JJ. I want a closer look at this thing..."

"Aye, aye, Captain," JJ said with a nod as he activated the airlock and magnetized the UO to the _Daytona_'s side.

Anderson went to the com and pressed down on the button, "PFC Alenko and PSCs Franklin and Marcus, report to the airlock for a spacewalk ASAP!"

The captain then went to the airlock and waited for the three private's arrival, pleased to see the three young and eager rookie marines of the Alliance's fleet standing before him. Kaidan Alenko was a twenty-nine year old biotic with L2 implants, something that aggravates him through migraines from time to time. His history in the Turbian biotics training facility aside, Kaidan is a respectable Sentinel of the Alliance whose abilities would lead him to greatness later on in his career. Michael T. Franklin, Jr. is a highly trained electronics expert and shows promise to any crew that he joins. He's a young man by human standards, a child by some of the more durable species of the universe, being only at the age of 19. Joe Marcus, aged 23, is another electrician, but one that has learned how to defend himself with any weapon available, usually a shotgun of his own design, making him an excellent choice to board a small, unidentifiable object drifting through space.

"Your mission is to investigate that UO," Anderson told them. The three helmeted rookies nodded and went into the airlock, the hissing of the shutting doors alerting the captain that they were now mentally prepping themselves.

Kaidan Alenko took a small intake of breath before he went to the door that separated him from the contents of the UO. Marcus and Franklin waited patiently as their field commander held his hand up and become enshrouded by a purple-ish blue energy, one that spread to the door and allowed Alenko to mentally pull it from its surprisingly complex hinges.

"Captain, we're in," Alenko said as they walked into the surprisingly small ship.

"_Good. Get what you can and bring it back. We don't know what type of ship that is or where it came from. Anderson, out,"_ Captain Anderson ordered.

Alenko turned back to the others and said, "You heard him. Take what you can and scram. My suit says our vitals should be fine for about fifteen minutes, twenty tops."

"Understood/Got it." Were the responses he received. Alenko turned and led the three into the shuttle, and went to place his hand against the wall.

"Gah!" Alenko yelped as he pulled his hand back. The other two looked at him questionably and he cradled his hand before replying, "I was...burned!"

"*whistle* this is one sorry sack o shit!" Marcus said with slight awe as he walked to a glassy looking tube and examined it, "We can barely fit in here because of this thing! Wonder what's in it..."

"Hey guys! I found a wall panel!" Franklin said as he went to the panel next to the tube, "There's no electric lock, either! Let's see what we-GAAASSCK!"

Electricity coursed through Franklin's body and caused him to convulse before being shot back to the _Daytona_'s airlock, making the two cry his name in concern before the ship actually hummed and loud alarms filled the air. The tube-like container hissed and it opened to the left. Smoke filled the area and Marcus and Kaidan waved their hands to clear their vision when they gaped at what they saw.

Lying against the wall, drifting because of the lack of gravity, was a blonde, nearly Marcus' age. He had three scars on each cheek and he wore a red cloak of some sort. Around his neck there was a necklace resembling a fox, two sapphires gleaming in it as its eyes. Kaidan instantly used his Omni-tool to check the blonde's vitals, scowling when the tool suddenly acted up and shut down.

"What the...? Ah, scrap it," Kaidan cursed, "Let's get him and Franklin back to the _Daytona_'s med bay."

"What about the container Franklin went for?" Marcus asked as he glanced back at the box, almost greedily, "This...guy might have something in there."

Not really concerned about what should be done with the container, more so about his men, Kaidan used his Biotics to tear it from the wall and throw it into the airlock. He looked back at Marcus with annoyance and asked, "Happy now? Let's go."

"Right." Marcus said as he grabbed the floating blonde and carried him back to the airlock of the _Daytona_. They entered with the blonde man on the ground and Franklin being assisted as the Airlock shut and decontaminated them.

* * *

><p><em>Who the fuck turned the sun on?<em> Was his first conscious thought. The blonde man blinked and rubbed his eyes as he sat up.

"Oh! You're awake," an elderly voice said with surprise, making the man look in the origin of the voice's direction. He saw an elderly woman with hazel eyes and wearing some sort of white uniform with a red N7 on her shoulders and on the right side of her chest.

"My name is Dr. Chakwas," the woman said, gesturing to herself before sitting in a chair that resembled one the blonde had seen Sakura use before, "What's yours?"

"Uh...Nam-Err, I mean, Naruto. Just Naruto," he said, recalling his last promise to his deceased parents, "Wha...Where am I?"

"You are onboard the Alliance Cruiser _Daytona_," Dr. Chakwas informed him as she wrote some notes down, "Naruto you said? Japanese for a slice of bento or maelstrom?"

"H-Hai..." Naruto said with a nod before looking around, "Wh-What's a cruiser? What year is this? How do you understand me? Where am I? What-?"

"Slow down," Dr. Chakwas said as she placed a comforting hand on his shoulder, "I'll answer all of your questions once I get some of my own answered. For your information, it is the year Twenty-one-seventy-nine."

"2179?" He repeated with wide eyes, "My god...over two-thousand years..."

"Two thousand years you say?" Chakwas replied with a wide eye, "Fascinating. What planet do you come from?"

"Earth," he said making Chakwas blink in confusion. Earth's technology might have spiked about forty years ago, but to her knowledge, the first successful spaceship launched in 1959 by Russia, now known as the Alliance Country of Russia, or the ACR.

"That...can't be right..." Chakwas said with confusion as she wrote down the information given to her, "You say over two-thousand years ago that ship was constructed. There were no countries I know of that had that sort of technology in that timeline."

"The Elemental Nations did," Naruto said with a nod before he frowned, "You've never heard of the Elemental Nations, have you?"

"Not once in all my life," Chakwas said with a shake of her head. Naruto sighed.

"Shit..." he muttered, pinching the bridge of his nose and cursing Kami, "I need a drink..."

"Well, I can't condone that until we finish your check-up," the doctor said before shaking her head, "But I can't use modern technology to do it for some reason. Some sort of energy keeps interfering."

"My chakra is interfering with your machines?" Naruto basically restated, earning a look from the doctor.

"You know what the energy is?" she asked with wide eyes. Naruto slowly nodded.

"Hai..." he said as he lifted his left hand and formed an incomplete Rasengan, "This is called a Rasengan, or Swirling Sphere. This is the incomplete form of it, but basically, it is raw chakra."

"Fascinating!" Chakwas said with wide eyes as she looked at the swirling energy in his hand, "And you can produce it willingly as well as control it?"

"Hai," the blonde said with a nod, "Chakra can also be used to enhance reflexes, the five senses, strength, speed, create fire, water, wind, earth, lightning, and even heal mortal wounds."

"Amazing..." Chakwas muttered, "Did all of your people manage to use this energy?"

"A good portion did," Naruto sighed out wistfully, "You have to start using it at childhood or your chakra coils shrivel up to nothing."

"Chakra Coils, you say?" Chakwas asked as she placed her holographic clip-board on her lap and placed a hand on her chin, "I never would have thought Earth was so...different two thousand years ago...I wonder..."

"Wonder what?" The blonde asked with suspicious eyes. Chakwas smiled at the boy and shook her head.

"Never you mind," she said, "Now...tell me Naruto, what was your world like?"

Naruto sighed sadly and looked at his hands, "We...were just at war before I was...banished. Children, adults...anyone our village needed to serve in a battle were recruited. Many retired were brought back to train the next generation. I lost many friends against the new foes. They were monsters...beasts that looked like large insects...They had first attacked the village hidden in rocks; Iwagakure no Sato. They then went after Kumogakure no Sato, and then my best friend gave his life to allow me to escape from Sunagakure no Sato..."

"We can let the past stay in the past if it's too hard," Chakwas said comfortingly as she placed a hand on his knee, making the blonde look at her with eyes full of pain and anguish.

"Thank you," he whispered before pinching the bridge of his nose and closing his eyes, "But I have to continue. The monsters...they were after me. I...I think it was because...Never mind."

Chakwas understood his need for secrecy and nodded before looking at her clipboard and pressing a few keys. She turned the board around and asked, "Is this what they looked like?"

On the clip board was the image of a large crustation-like insect with the word Rachni underneath it. Naruto's eyes narrowed at it and they flashed yellow with a four-pointed stars as pupils as he growled.

"I take it these were what your people fought?" Chakwas asked. Naruto nodded.

"Those...those fucking things killed my friends!" he snarled, "If I ever see another one, I'm shoving a Fuuton: Rasengan up its non-existent ass!"

"Easy, easy," Chakwas soothed as she placed a hand on his shoulder, "They're called Rachni. They're all gone. Wiped out by the Krogan...Come with me, I'll start answering questions for you."

* * *

><p>"You asked for me, Sir?" Kaidan asked as he stepped into the room where Captain Anderson was waiting as he watched through a viewer observing the picked up blonde.<p>

"Ah, Alenko," Anderson said as he turned to smile at the L2 Biotic, "Mission accomplished. Not only did you return with one minor injury, but you saved the life of a captive and survivor of the first Rachni invasion ever recorded on earth."

"I-what?" Kaidan repeated as his eyes widened. Anderson gestured to the screen that showed the blonde, now dressed in an orange and black shirt and black cargo pants, performing what appeared to be hand to hand combat tests. He was currently wiping the floor with the chosen instructor, Marcus, and the Captain looked almost approving with how the electrician was getting his ass kicked.

"Why Marcus?" Kaidan asked as he watched Naruto deliver a kick to Marcus' throat. The electrician reached for his throat and coughed violently while the blonde settled into an unknown fighting style.

"It seems Marcus here is a thief," Anderson said with a shake of his head, "God knows how many things he's stolen from the Alliance. Naruto, the man you saved, caught him in the act of going through his box, which only had a large scroll in it."

"_Dobe! You understand what I'm beating into you?_" Naruto spat to the downed man, "_Go through anyone else's things again, and I'll rip your damn hands off!_"

"Yeesh," Kaidan winced as Naruto kicked Marcus in the side for good measure, "He's really pissed at Marcus..."

"Apparently Marcus went through that envelope that was in the box," Anderson said with a saddened tone, "They were...farewell messages to Naruto from his friends before he was...banished."

"My god..." Kaidan muttered as the blonde turned and began pulling the notes back into the envelope before leaving the room with the scroll and envelope in hand.

"I want you to go talk to him, Kaidan," the captain said, "Try and persuade him to sign up for the alliance when we dock at the citadel."

"I'll...Do what I can," the biotic said with little assurance.

* * *

><p><strong>Citadel, Widow Nebula, 6 Years Later (Year 2185)<strong>

"So who did you say this guy was, Shepard?" A Krogan with light orangish-red skin and light grey armor asked a man that stood almost six feet tall and had shaved strawberry blonde hair. He had a chiseled jaw and some scarring existed, but seemed to be fading. He wore a dark green Cerberus issued space armor, the helmet having a light blue visor hiding his grey eyes.

"Zaeed told me this guy was the only other man just as good as he was," Shepard replied sternly, "And if we're going against the collectors, we're gonna need all the help we can get, Grunt."

"Shepard is correct," Dr. Mordin Solus said, the Salarian geneticist said with a nod, "Need more skills to stop collectors. Dangerous to go at them alone. Need varieties. Biotics and Krogan not enough. Need cunning merc like the Fox."

"You've heard of the Fox, Mordin?" Shepard asked, turning to face the Salarian.

"Fox is dangerous; Very dangerous," Mordin said with a small shiver, "Makes a Krogan look like kind kitten. Gets job done no matter what, always works alone, kills everyone and anyone aside from women and children."

"Unless they're related to the Rachni Reforming project," a voice said from above them. They all looked up, with their weapons ready, at the rafters. Standing on the bottom of the rafters, similar to the thief they contracted a few days before only _upside down_, was a spikey haired blonde with an artist goatee under his chin. Three slashes were on either cheek of his face and yellow eyes with four-pointed star pupils looked down at them. He wore orange and black cargo pants with an orange jacket with black flame edging over a black shirt with an orange swirl on it. Around his neck dangled a golden necklace.

"Impressive," Mordin said as he placed his hand cannon pistol back at his hip, "Anti-gravity biotics. Thought only to be rumors. Perhaps a chance to examine..."

"Peh, we'll see," Grunt grumbled as he put his Krogan shotgun away and the Salarian drifted off into a ramble. Shepard holstered his rifle and looked at the man curiously.

"You know anyone named Katsumi?" the commander asked with a smile.

"Met her boyfriend a couple of years back," the blonde replied before falling to the ground, "So you cost Zaeed his 'vengeance' eh?"

"Bastard left as soon as we landed here," Grunt snarled as he crossed his arms, "Pansy, he doesn't realize he could just get another shot after we're done."

"Those people needed to be saved," Shepard replied with a nod, "I wasn't going to let Zaeed's anger cost them their lives."

"Good move, Shepard," the blonde said with a grin, revealing canine-like teeth, "Glad I signed up. Name's Naruto. Call me Fox if ya want. I'll move my own things in, thanks."

"Welcome aboard, Naruto," the Commander said, "_Normandy_ is docked at dock three."

"Maa, maa, I know, I know." The blonde dismissed as he started walking towards the _Normandy II_ before suddenly combusting into a burst of smoke. Shepard, Grunt and Mordin blinked in confusion before shaking their heads and walking back towards the Human Council's chambers.

Anderson needed to be debriefed.

* * *

><p>"And who are you supposed to be?" A black haired woman with striking blue eyes asked as Naruto walked on the <em>Normandy<em>.

"The best hit man this side of the Nebula, babe," Naruto replied with a wink, "and you are?"

"Executive officer of this ship, Miranda Lawson," Miranda replied with a downward glare, "What's your purpose on this ship?"

"Ah leave the new guy alone, Cheerleader," a tattooed woman with a shaved head wearing a leather bikini and cargos, the articles of clothes making her seem the exact opposite of the Cerberus uniformed XO, said as she walked towards them. She smiled smugly at the irritated XO and glanced at the blonde, giving him a once over before smirking.

"Not bad," she said with a grin, "Like the jacket. Nice touch."

"Got it off a job back over in the Local," the blonde replied with a grin, "Want it?"

"Nah," the woman said with a shake of her head, "Looks too...obvious."

"You'd be surprised..." Naruto started.

"Jack," the woman said and then raised her glowing hand warningly, "One joke about a sex change and I'll see to it you don't reproduce!"

"There's a threat I haven't gotten in a long time," Naruto chuckled out before smiling at her, "Already I feel at home. I'll be moving in now. Exec, Jack, pleasure meeting ya both. Ja ne."

He vanished with a swirl of leaves, making the two women blink before Jack grinned.

"Oh I like him," the biotic ex-convict said with a sadistic tone, "He's gonna make this fun."

"He's gonna cause trouble," Miranda countered before glaring at Jack, "Don't you have somewhere else to be?"

"Don't you have a stick to remove from your ass?" Jack shot back as she walked away cackling.

* * *

><p>"Ahh..." Naruto sighed as he fell onto the mat laid out in the 'Garbage' room, which was really the garbage disposal unit's command post. He took a moment to relax before looking at the small scroll he placed in a handmade holder he had at the desk.<p>

_Do I even want to hear their voices again?_ He thought sadly before looking at the sky, _Would they scold me for following the ninja way? For...becoming a...a killer? No...ninja are tools, but we remain human with our hobbies. I used to train and garden as well as talk with my friends. Here, in this time...I have no friends. No garden. No training grounds for jutsu. Meditate. That's all I do._

With a heavy sigh, the twenty nine year old stood and stripped down to his boxers before sitting in the lotus position on his bed. With a heavy mind, Naruto sighed once again and closed his eyes, allowing the Sage mode to overcome him. His energy reached out to the ship and surrounding beings, meeting and becoming one with many biotics.

"_Hello Naruto,"_ an electronic female voice greeted, making the blonde lazily lift one eye, both eyes now being surrounded by orange make-up. He blinked as the blue glowing digital orb seemed to stare right at him before smiling.

"I'm going to dismantle you piece by piece if you interrupt my training again," he said cheerfully, similar to an old friend by the name of Sai would.

"_I will log that in my records, Naruto."_ The voice said once again, _"I am EDI, the Elec-"_

"Not gonna remember it, don't bother," the blonde said with an eye roll before leaning forward and resting his head on his overlapped hands, "What do you want?"

"_The Illusive Man would like you to accompany Shepard in the Debriefing room."_

"Tell your 'Illusive Man' to fuck off," Naruto snarled, his eyes going from a kind threat to sheer malice, "I don't take orders from anyone unless they pay me."

"_He is-"_

"I declined that payment!" Naruto hissed, "I don't want dirty money in my pocket. Not from some sick freak that wants humans to reign supreme."

"_Very well. Might I inquire why you are here then?"_ the AI asked.

Naruto glanced at the scroll on his desk faster than the AI's camera could register before softening his gaze and looking at his hands, "I...Promised someone very dear to me that I would stop all wars. Bring peace to my home."

"_You're a bounty hunter. You have no home."_ The AI noted. Naruto laughed somberly.

"Yeah...I thought that, too," Naruto said with a depressed tone, "But...I came to a realization. I will always have a home, even if it's not listed by my name. My home is at any door that will have me without pay, the just will be known as my family."

Naruto glanced over at his left arm and held it up as a blue light appeared on his arm, making EDI glitch for a moment, before he looked at the photobook in his hand.

"These...are faces of the dead," Naruto said as he opened the book. The AI disappeared a moment before returning to Naruto's side, scanning the pages of smiling children, "On the colony of Eden Prime."

"_They gave you a place to stay?"_ EDI asked. Naruto nodded before looking at the item in his hands and turning the page.

"They gave me many things," he sighed sadly as he came across the picture of a girl with long blue hair and light eyes, "A trip to the past, memories long forgotten brought to my mind. Tears...I cried after ten years of hardship as soon as I heard of Eden Prime's demise. I was on Omega...helping a...friend rise to power. I stayed afterwards to make sure nothing happened to her."

The door suddenly hissed open and a Turian with a burnt face stormed into the room, his pistol locked on Naruto's head. Grunt, Mordin, Jack, Shepard, Miranda and a woman wearing dark clothes as well as an black human followed him, the many going wide eyed at what they saw.

"Archangel," Naruto said without looking up, "how long has it been? Five, ten months?"

"Eleven on the dot," the Turian growled, "Who let you on this ship?"

"Talk to Shepard," Naruto said, "And stop pointing that at me, you know how I hate those things."

"I hate having to watch a man die while my source gets off scotch free!" the Turian roared, his hand trembling. Shepard stepped forward and grabbed his wrist.

"Stand down, Garrus!" the commander said sternly, "Naruto is here to help."

"Commander, he's a coward! Nothing more and nothing less!" Garrus shouted with narrowed eyes, "I lost my first man that day, and it was all your fault!"

"You didn't lose anyone, Turian," a voice said with a growl. Everyone took a step back in shock as another Naruto appeared with a sharp object digging into Garrus' throat, blood appearing at the wound, "Connor wanted out of your games, and he got out. I smuggled him and Cherry to the Citadel for only twenty credits and a pack of smokes."

"Impossible! I saw him get gunned down!" Garrus said before stilling as the blade seeped deeper in the wound.

"I sit before you reading a book talking to a machine as well as holding a blade to your throat, trying to tell you what happened, and you expect me to believe your cries of impossible?" the Naruto with the blade asked, "I could have killed you seven thousand different ways the moment you decided to storm my room, but I restrained myself to see why an old _accomplice_ came to visit me. I'm very forgiving, luckily for you, so consider this a warning."

"Naruto, stand down!" Shepard managed to bark as soon as he regained his wits. No sooner had he delivered the order, the blonde holding Garrus hostage and the blonde reading a scrapbook vanished into poofs of smoke. A hidden blonde dropped from the open vent shaft and shook his head.

"Horrible reflexes, all of you," he said with disappointment, "well, maybe not Katsumi, but a good portion of you need to work on that."

"That...That was...That was..." Katsumi repeated, her eyes becoming slightly visible under her hood as the group looked at her. Naruto sighed and pinched his nose.

"Yes, Kage Bunshin," he said, making the thief faint into the Krogan's arms, "Huh, I did not see that coming."

"What's a...Ka-jay Boo-shin?" Shepard asked. Naruto shook his head and looked at Garrus, before reaching into his pocket and pulling a holo note out.

"That can wait. Here, I figured you wouldn't believe me unless you read this with me in front of you," the blonde said before suddenly stabbing his hand, "And as you can see, I'm the real one."

"Damn, he's _real_ good!" Jack said with awe before grinning, "I like him!"

* * *

><p><strong>AN: there's chapter one. Tell me what you think. His past on the Daytona and his life during Mass Effect 1 and 2 will be explained over the course of the story. Ja Ne!<strong>**REVIEW!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Captain's Quarters aboard the **_**Normandy**_**, Widow Nebula, Citadel Space, Year 2185**

"Goddammit," Wade Shepard grumbled in displeasure as he cleaned the drink he accidently spilled on his off duty Cerberus uniform while he was searching the Net for Fox's background in his personal quarters. He felt wrong not being in his normal N7 skivvies, but the strawberry blonde had more troubling matters on his mind to worry about. Most of the matters revolved around his old Turian friend, Garrus, and the most recent addition to the crew, Naruto. Garrus had read the letter that was delivered to him via the blonde merc, but still didn't trust the spikey haired blonde, which led several other crew members to distrust Naruto as well. Namely Jacob and Miranda, the former being distrusting of Mercs in general while the latter was upset that the Illusive Man wouldn't cough up any information on the blonde.

In fact, the only three that seemed to stand up for the blonde were Mordin, Grunt, and Jack. If that wasn't surprising enough, Joker, the semi-crippled pilot of the _Normandy_, had talked to the blonde about upgrades, and came back with several top-notch internal security drones if the _Normandy_ was ever boarded. Which Naruto assured would be unlikely.

"_Commander Shepard,_" EDI's voice rang in his speakers. The reactivated Spectre (Special Operatives and Recon) Agent sighed before swiveling around in his chair to face the AI.

"What's up EDI?" Shepard asked, crossing his arms over his chest.

"_You have an incoming message from the Human Council Ambassador, David Anderson,_" Shepard's eyebrow shot up upon hearing this and he nodded.

"Patch him through," Shepard said with a small smile. The small computer screen at Shepard's desk flickered for a moment before the face of an elderly dark skinned human appeared. Shepard gave the man a salute of respect.

"Ambassador Anderson," the commander greeted with a formal salute to his old commander, "To what do I owe this honor?"

"_Heh-heh, at ease, Shepard,"_ Anderson replied with a smile, _"I forgot to ask about the newest addition to your crew...You said Cerberus wasn't aware of his acceptance?"_

"They are now, sir," Shepard replied with a shake of his head, "Naruto the Fox, I believe his name was."

"_Naruto? Blonde, spikey hair, strange abilities to be in more than one place at a time?"_ Anderson asked before cupping his chin, _"I...didn't know..."_

"Sir? Did you know Naruto?" Shepard asked with raised eyebrows.

"_Yes...in fact, you both share a friend in Lieutenant Alenko..."_ Anderson said before shaking his head, _"But they had a falling out...I wondered what happened to him. Where is he now?"_

"Dr. Chakwas is giving him a once over," Shepard replied, earning a chuckle from the Ambassador. Confused, he then asked, "Something I said funny?"

"_Oh...I highly doubt Chakwas is giving Naruto a medical check over,"_ Anderson said with a mischievous twinkle in his eyes.

* * *

><p>"To Shepard!" Naruto hiccupped out as he drank some more brandy, "May he lead us all to either victory, or a horrible, gruesome death!"<p>

"Naruto, you simply must learn to watch what you say about the Commander," Chakwas scolded her longtime friend, "Now, tell me more about this Asari girl you met on Illium."

"Morgan..." Naruto sighed out with a smile before frowning, "Or was it Megan? Mallory? Ah, fuck it, she had an M name...Anyway, there I was, talking to my client about taking out some scum that worked for the Shadow Broker, and some beautiful Asari suddenly walks up to me and tries to charm me. Well, that doesn't work, as you know, because I'm..."

"Special, yes, I know," Chakwas chuckled out, "In more ways than one if I remember correctly."

"One time! One time I thought that the sink was a toilet!" Naruto shouted with narrowed eyes, making the doctor laugh, "Humph...Well, anyway, I turn to her and says, "Babe, I don't know what the fuck you're doing, but wait fifteen minutes and I'll come screw your mind" or something like that...She tells me she'll be at the bar and winks before sauntering over to a twenty year old Salarian visiting to try and sell his collection of old albums or something. I talks to my client, get paid front up and go through mental checklists to kill the target, right? I go to the Asari that came up to me before and she tries to charm me again, but still nothing. She seemed to get really pissed about that for some reason, but I brushed it off."

"Skip to the good part already," Chakwas said with irritation and a bit of drunken boredom lingering in her voice.

"I'm getting there, I'm getting there, geez," he muttered before taking another swig of brandy, "So then she tells me to meet her at her apartment that night, which I do, but when I get there, she's fuckin duking it out with a damn Justicar!"

"No!" Chakwas said with wide eyes, "Holding her own?"

"Barely," Naruto scoffed, "Had I not tackled the Justicar, this is before I knew she was one mind you, she'd have been dead. So long story short, I tackled the Justicar, grabbed the Asari's arm, and got her out of there before the Justicar knew what hit her. Long story short: Best Asari sex in my life. This chick knew some things that I wasn't aware Asari could do!"

"My god!" Chakwas said with wide eyes before laughing, "That reminds me of my first experience with an Asari...ah, to be young."

"What're you talkin' about, Doc?" Naruto asked with wide eyes as he poured himself another glass, "You can't be older than thirty-five, forty tops."

"Flattery won't get you anywhere Naruto. It definitely won't get you a bottle of my prized Sake collection," Dr. Chakwas said with a smug smile. Naruto pouted.

"Aww...Please? One cup?" the blonde pleaded. Chakwas laughed as he continued to beg and plead for a bottle of sake while she poured herself some more brandy.

* * *

><p>"Miranda," Jacob said as he entered her office, "We need to talk."<p>

"If this is about getting answers from Naruto, don't bother Jacob," Miranda sighed as she went through Cerberus reports, "I've already tried hacking his personal computer-"

"He managed to keep you from hacking his computer?" Jacob asked with wide eyes. Miranda sent a glare the man's way.

"Don't insult me, Jacob," the raven haired woman said, "Of course I hacked it. The damn fool doesn't have anything there! He still writes reports! _Hand_ written reports!"

"Whoa...talk about old school," Jacob muttered as he rubbed his chin, "So...What do we know about him?"

"Not much," the Cerberus second in command sighed out in dismay, "Unlike most of our crew, he's a ghost. Unless someone manages to break his shell and get him to talk, I don't think...Oh don't you dare think about it!"

"Sorry, sorry," Jacob replied, holding a hand up, "Maybe Shepard can get through to him..."

"Have you talked to Garrus about him?" Miranda asked. Before Jacob could reply, a small humming sound reached the ears of both Cerberus members and pressure along with heat was suddenly felt against their necks.

"You wouldn't happen to be talking about me, would you?" two voices echoed in the room. The door hissed and Shepard sighed before crossing his arms.

"Thank you EDI," he said when a voice echoed back, "_Of course, Commander._"

"Now..." Shepard started, "What's going on here?"

"They're invading my privacy," the two Naruto clones said neutrally, "They have no right."

"If we're going to work together, we might as well get to know one another," Miranda calmly stated, while inwardly she was unnerved that the blonde could sneak into her room without her noticing it.

"Hm...true, but you already don't trust me because of prejudice and paranoia, my two least favorite things in the world," the Naruto holding Jacob in place grumbled, the Naruto threatening Miranda continued, "So, as you can see, sneaking around behind my back won't get you in my head any sooner than a bullet to the balls would."

"No," a voice in the hall said, and everyone turned to see a smirking Katsumi holding an envelope in her hand, "But these will. I wonder what's so important that you can't copy it to digital data, shall we find out?"

"Where did you get that?" the Naruto holding Miranda asked as the one holding Jacob vanished in a puff of smoke.

"Your room, small hidden safe," Katsumi said in an almost bored tone, "Really should think about changing your locks. Ramen? Really? You make it too easy, Naruto-kun."

"Alright, that's enough!" Shepard shouted, stepping in as Naruto's eyes turned cold and the blade against Miranda's neck sunk in, causing the genetically and biotic enhanced woman to gasp. Shepard looked at Naruto and narrowed his eyes, "Let her go. Now."

"Get that envelope for me and I will," the blonde growled, his eyes flashing red. Shepard nodded and looked at Katsumi, who slowly handed it over while secretly slipping a folded piece of paper into her sleeve. The Commander looked back at the blonde and said, "There. Now let her go."

"Yes sir," Naruto replied, releasing his hold on the woman and flickering to the commander's side with his hand held out, "If you don't mind..."

"Maybe I should hold onto them," Shepard mumbled, his unsure eyes giving the effect of the threat he was starting to speak, "For safe keeping."

"The Universe would be a hero less if you do," Naruto snarled before snatching the envelope from the commander's hand. He sent a meaningful glare to the two Cerberus biotics before turning and walking away, brushing past a unnerved Shepard. Katsumi stepped out of his way, both locked eyes for a millisecond, before she went off to her quarters on the observation deck.

As soon as she was in the elevator, she reached into her sleeve and pulled the folded note she had stolen out. Before she could read it, a small thump and a pain throughout her body alerted her to not being alone anymore. Katsumi gasped as she looked up to see Naruto looking down at her with hardened yellow eyes, his hands pinning her wrists above her head. To an outsider, it was a very promiscuous position they were in, with the blonde pushing his body against her own, their curves aligning almost perfectly.

"I thought you didn't steal from friends, Kat-chan?" he asked with a husky whisper. Katsumi felt a shiver go down her spine before recalling someone who she promised to love forever.

"You _were_ my friend, Naruto-kun," Katsumi whispered back coyly, "But you didn't help him when _he_ asked for it."

"I was busy, Kat-chan," Naruto growled, "He knew the risks. He went after it anyway, though. For you. Don't try this again, Kat-chan. I won't be as forgiving as I am now."

"And how are you-mph!" Katsumi's eyes widened as she felt his lips press against hers. Before it even registered in her mind just what was happening, his lips pulled back and he kissed her cheek before moving his mouth to her ear.

"He asked me to give you that when I could," Naruto whispered, "I've fulfilled my promise to him, but broken the one I made to you. I'm sorry, Kat-chan. I truly am."

Before Katsumi could reply, he vanished in a swirl of leaves, leaving her alone in the elevator. Frustrated, sad, and confused, Katsumi slid down against the elevator's wall and hugged her legs to her chest. With tears rolling down her cheeks, the thief thought, _I know Naruto-kun...but how can I forgive you after Omega? How can I forgive myself?_

* * *

><p>Naruto sighed as he placed the envelope back in his safe and changed the passcode. He sighed and went to his bed, falling onto his back as he thought about his day so far.<p>

_Kat-chan won't forgive me until she forgives herself,_ Naruto thought as he closed his eyes, _And the longer it takes for her to forgive herself, the safer she'll be from the Reapers. Those Cerberus clowns are getting antsy, and Archangel, erm, Garrus needs assurance that Connor and Cherry are alive. Grunt, Jack, and Dr. Mordin seem ok with me, thankfully. It seems only Shepard is the one I don't have any information on. Well, aside from the basic hero speech of course._

Before he could fall into his thoughts once again, Shepard's voice echoed through his room, _"Naruto, I need you for a mission. Double time!"_

* * *

><p>"This will get the job done," Mordin said as he handed the blonde clad in his mission attire (orange shirt with black swirl under black leather jacket with cargo pants and combat boots as well as an oxygen mask in his back pouch) a Hand-cannon pistol, "Large rounds, adaptable for any situation. Aim and pull the trigger. Should help more in a bad situation...probably."<p>

"Yeah, yeah," Naruto grumbled as he took the cannon before giving it back, "No, too slow. I need something that I don't need precision to take someone down."

Grunt grunted and asked, "What? You a hit and run warrior? Cowardly..."

"No, I double tap," Naruto shot back with a grin before nudging the Krogan in the side, "Besides, if they ain't down, you get to take the kill."

Grunt chuckled and gave a small smile to the blonde before turning and grabbing something from the table. He tossed it to the blonde, who caught it and was shocked to see a Shuriken SMG. He checked the sights and aligned them to his liking before giving the Krogan and Salarian a smile back as he decided to take the pistol Mordin offered him.

"Thanks Doc, Grunt," he said with a nod as he holstered both weapons. He went past them to Shepard's side on the dropship, his eyes going wide as Miranda joined Shepard's left side, their eyes meeting with a glare.

"Let's go," Shepard ordered. As they sat, Naruto caught a glimpse of Katsumi watching from behind a corner and gave her a grin and thumbs up before climbing in the drop-ship. He sat across from Shepard and Miranda.

"So what's up?" he asked.

"The Illusive Man gave us heads up on a human colony in the Terminus Systems under attack by the Collectors," Miranda said, "The colony Horizon is currently under attack."

"You mean those Collector things are real?" Naruto asked with wide eyes, "Damn...Here I thought they were just monsters in the closet..."

"They're real all right," Shepard said with a light hint of aggravation in his voice, "But I think they're fighting for the Reapers."

"Which don't exist," Naruto snickered out, "Man, the Alliance sure doesn't like to check things out if they don't have to."

"Which is why we're going in," Shepard said with determination, "Stop goofing off, I need you at your best."

"You couldn't handle me at my best," Naruto smugly replied as he turned to lounge in his seat, "Wake me when we make it to Horizon. I gotta get some shut eye."

* * *

><p>An hour later, Miranda kicked the blonde in the side as she started to leave the drop-ship, "Wake up!"<p>

"Ugh," Naruto groaned, "Did we make it?"

"Yeah, but unfortunately we're going to meet the welcoming committee," Shepard said as he pulled his Victory Rifle out and primed it, "Miranda, flank left, Naruto take the right!"

"Right/Gotcha boss!" the two replied as they pulled their SMGs out and took cover behind some wall ruins. Three humanoid insect-like aliens landed a few meters from them and pulled their own variations of weapons out, firing blasts at Shepard. Naruto popped his head over and saw a Collector start to glow.

"**Shepard...Join us...**_**or die**_**,"** The collector said.

"That is so wrong on every level!" Naruto shouted as he fought the shivers away before unloading scattered blasts that had little effect on the glowing being, "Hey, Shepard! This guy's got a beef with you!"

Shepard turned his attention away from the Collector Assassin he took out with a few scattered bursts and began firing at the glowing Collector.

"What the hell is that thing?" Miranda asked over the gunfire, "It has to have a Biotic Barrier or something!"

"**We are Harbinger..." **the glowing Collector said with monotone as it shot a round at the blonde shooting at him.

"Well, that answers that question..." Naruto grimly muttered as his SMG jammed and he fell behind cover. He tossed the gun away and dug around in his pockets for something while Shepard took action.

"Hit it with a warp blast!" Shepard ordered before switching to his shotgun, "Naruto, use your pistol to-"

"How about I just do this?" Naruto shouted back as he tied a tag around a sharp kunai he pulled from his right leg pouch. The tag had black ink on it and he grinned before tossing it directly at the Harbinger's revealed leg. The blade sunk deep into the wound and Naruto held two fingers up. Miranda and Shepard blinked at his actions, but couldn't stop to ask him about it.

"Kai!" he exclaimed before a large explosion evaporated where the Harbinger once was. Naruto smirked and stood, looking at his jammed SMG with a scowl.

"This is why I hate these things," he muttered before shaking his head. He walked to the nearest deceased Collector and activated his custom Omni-tool. Instead of the usual orange-yellow color most Omni-tools were, Naruto's was a light blue, and a small frog appeared on his wrist.

"_Ohayo!_" the frog greeted, "_What can I do for you Naruto-sama?_"

"Scan and report," Naruto instructed his VI Kichi, designed after the summoning toad he befriended millennia ago. The frog turned its attention to the carcass before wincing.

"_Dead..._" VI-Kichi said, "_Collector, drone warrior. Not enough data to report. Gomen._"

"It's all right," Naruto replied, giving the VI a smile, "Thanks anyway, Kichi."

"_Bye!_" the VI said before the Omni-tool turned off. No sooner had he turned his off did Miranda activate hers.

"I'll send the data back to the Normandy for investigation," she said before looking at Shepard, "We should hurry up, God knows how many lives are already lost to these...monsters..."

"Ma, so negative," Naruto waved off as he reached behind him and pulled a modified pair of brass knuckles set out before channeling some Wind Chakra through it. He grinned and spun the newly formed blades around in his hand several times before looking at an awed pair. He chuckled.

"Chakra blades," he said with a smirk, "One of a kind. I'll scout ahead. Tell ya what I find."

"Right, keep yourself safe," Shepard said as he picked a Collector's Particle Cannon up and tested the grip, "And don't do anything stupid."

"Too late to say that," Miranda muttered. Naruto turned around and quietly mocked her before leaping to the rooftops and beginning his scouting endeavor.

* * *

><p><em>Tch, these guys are too organized, it makes it so simple to find the snipers, <em>Naruto thought as he sliced the neck of a Collector Assassin with his blades, _No imagination, just pure tactical bests...like they're a single mind...Oh god, it's like fighting Pein all over again, but ten times as worse!_

No sooner did he think that did a beam of energy whizz by his ear. Naruto scowled and pulled his Hand Cannon out and unloaded a single round into the head of the opposing Collector Drone, attracting the attention of the Drone's teammates that were pulling a pod towards the west of the compound. He quickly leapt down and took them out with a combination of his old Hi no Ken taijutsu and his chakra blades.

"Damned bugs," he grunted before inspecting a nearby pod with a human female in it. She had blonde hair pulled back into a ponytail, which made Naruto do a double check, before he sliced the pod open with his blade. Sure enough, the juices keeping the girl paralyzed spilled out and she sat up with a gasp. Naruto assisted her in getting out of the pod while simultaneously speaking into his mic, "Shepard! Ten clicks ahead, found a recovery team and took out four snipers already. I have a survivor, repeat, I have a survivor!"

"_zzt...Ruto! Say-...zzt..."_ was the disrupted reply he received. Naruto scowled and looked at the deceased group of Collectors before looking at the girl. She was coughing as she knelt on the ground.

"You ok?" he asked with an arched brow of slight concern. The girl nodded before looking up and seeing his necklace, the sapphire eyes gleaming almost ominously. Her eyes widened with fear and she looked at his face.

"...F-Fox..." she gasped out, "Y-You...what are you...why are you...?"

"Relax, lady, I'm here to help," Naruto said as he knelt and used some Medi-Gel on her bruised arm, "I'm not on a job. Well, I am, but I'm not killing anything aside from those motherfuckers."

"D-did the Lieutenant call you in?" she struggled to ask before coughing harshly. Naruto lightly patted her back and helped her get the residue paralyzing agent out.

"I don't know, you'd have to ask my superior," the blonde man replied before looking at her, pushing the memory of a loudmouthed, stubborn, and flirty blonde he knew long ago to the back of his mind and asking, "What's your name?"

"Ino," she replied, making Naruto's eyes go wide, "Ino Shimura."

"Ok Ino," he said with a nod, still pushing the memories and pains away, "I'm going to ask you what happened, I need every detail you can remember."

"I was eating lunch with my friends when suddenly this swarm of bugs just flew in and attacked everyone!" Ino said, throwing her arms out, "People tried to run when we suddenly froze. Then those...things showed up. They took my friends and put them in those pods, and then they grabbed me and put me in the pod, and then...Oh god, where are my friends? Where's my mom and dad? Did you find them, too? What are they...WHAT ARE THEY?"

"Whoa, easy, easy," Naruto chided, placing his hands on the frantic teen's shoulders and looking her in the eyes, "Settle down. They're Collectors. Yes, Collectors. I'm sorry Ino but you're in the last pod in the area...I don't know if they got your parents or friends, but I'll find out and get them back if they do. I promise."

"O-Ok..." Ino said unsurely when an explosion suddenly rocked the air and they turned to see a beat up looking ship combined with a hive start to lift off. Naruto grinned when he heard his radio come to life.

"_-uto? Naruto! Do you copy?"_ Shepard's voice asked. Naruto looked back at the girl with a grin and replied with, "Yes sir, Commander. What's your position, I'll come to you."

"_We're at the communications/AA Gun area,"_ Shepard replied. Naruto furrowed his brows before looking at the blonde girl.

"I know where that is! The Lieutenant came to make sure our AAs work after several colonies went missing," Ino shouted.

"_Who was that?_" Miranda asked over the comm. Naruto chuckled.

"My guide, Babe. I'll be there in a flash, Commander," he replied before turning around and crouching, "Get on my back and tell me where to go."

"Why do I need to get on your back?" Ino asked with a slight blush.

"It's either a piggyback ride or I carry you over my shoulder," the whiskered blonde replied with a smirk. Ino blushed even further and wrapped her arms around his neck as he hooked his under her legs. She practically glowed red when he said, "Hm, nice and firm. Not bad, Ms. Shimura."

* * *

><p>"Where is he?" Miranda asked as she examined the Scion carcass that was near the comms array, "I thought he was only scouting the area, not on a vacation."<p>

"I was doing no such thing!" Naruto countered as he landed from the roof with an awed and shaken blonde girl riding on his back, "As a matter of fact, I was saving a survivor and killing some Collectors!"

"You couldn't call to check in?" Shepard countered. Naruto gave him a look.

"You're the one that didn't check with EDI about communications being down," he countered as he let Ino drop to her feet before she collapsed to her knees, "Some leader...can't even keep an eye on one of his own teammates, just letting me run off like that."

"You offered to go!" Shepard shot back with confusion and irritation, "I tried to call you back, and then I tried to get some back up. Next time, stick with me!"

"Yeah, whatever _Mom_," Naruto scoffed out before he turned and offered Ino a hand to her feet, "Ino Shimura, meet the infamous Commander Wade Shepard. My boss."

"Z-O-M-G!" Ino squealed as she clasped her hands in front of her face, "You're, like, the Hero of the Citadel! I've heard almost every story Lt. Alenko had to tell about you! Were you really the first _human_ Spectre Agent? Did Lt. Alenko save you from the Geth?"

"Whoa, back up now," Naruto said, holding his hands up before looking at Shepard, "You worked with Alenko? _Kaidan_ Alenko?"

"Yes," A voice from behind Shepard said as a black haired man walked out from behind a grate with a sniper in hand, "And he's still just as much of a magnet for danger as when we first met."

"Kaidan/_Alenko_." Shepard and Naruto simultaneously greeted, the former with a smile while the latter's surprise dropped into a scowl.

"I just wish the rumors about you allied with Cerberus were just rumors," Kaidan said with a frown, "I thought we don't work for the bad guys, Shepard."

"Cerberus isn't my boss, Kaidan," Shepard replied with a small amount of sorrow as his smile also dropped into a frown, "They are doing something about the Collectors that the Alliance isn't, which is why I'm with them."

"They're terrorists!" Kaidan shot back, his eyes narrowing, "You remember what they did to those people!"

"Yes, and I don't like it," Shepard said, "But the Past is the Past."

"You're just going to let it go? After what they've done?" Kaidan asked with wide eyes before shaking his head, "I guess you are an easy forgiver."

"Too bad I'm not, Alenko," Naruto growled, interrupting Shepard before he could speak, "You owe me for that shot in the Hades nebula five years ago."

"You were trying to kill a Representative of one of Earth's colonies visiting the Citadel!" Kaidan said before grabbing his leg, which now had a chakra blade in it courtesy of the irritated blonde.

"Save it for the record books, Alenko!" the blonde snarled, "Your little 'heroic' act might have saved one life, but it cost the lives of several innocents, do you remember? That Biotic's rampage at that store? All over ONE FUCKING CREDIT? And I fucking warned you, too!"

"You mean the 'Reave Biotic' Nathaniel Jonas?" Miranda questioned with an arched brow.

"I told you I didn't know he was going to do that, Naruto-" Kaidan tried to explain himself but Naruto cut him off, "You did know, _Alenko_. Save your apologies for Karl Hiptan, Salarian, age 33; Shiva C'torr-Hiptan, Asari, age 321; and their son, Marque Hiptan, Salarian, age five."

Kaidan's head fell and Naruto continued, "Serena Marc, 45, human. Cite Dan, Borlan, 121. Neemor vas Fortuna, 16, Quarian. Dur'rick, 235, Krogan-"

"That's enough, Naruto!" Shepard barked, the two exchanging a glare before the blonde snorted and walked away. Shepard looked from the vacating blonde to the L2 Biotic and said, "Kaidan, that wasn't your fault-"

"It was my fault Shepard," Kaidan sighed out, "That was the day before he left the alliance. The day after he did, Nathaniel was found dead at the scene of the crime, his body dismembered like a beast, or a feral Krogan, got him."

"He was in the Alliance?" Shepard asked while Miranda began typing in several codes to her Omni-tool to gain access to the Alliance Network's Database. Kaidan nodded before looking at Shepard.

"Look, Wade," he said, "We've been through a lot. We're friends, even if you're with Cerberus...But Naruto and I...Never mind, he's always been kind of private about his life. I gotta go report this. You're sure that Cerberus had nothing to do with this?"

"Would I be with them if they did?" Shepard countered making Kaidan smile.

"That's true," the Biotic said with a nod, "Well, I'll write what I can. It was...nice to see you again, Commander."

"You too, Kaidan," the strawberry blonde replied as his friend walked away with the young Ino Shimura in tow, "You too."

* * *

><p>"<em>Shepard, I didn't know that Kaidan Alenko and The Fox had a previous relationship,"<em> the Illusive Man later said, _"I wasn't even aware that The Fox was in the Alliance! Now, what about that Collector information?"_

"I'll keep you posted," 'Shepard' said before he turned the receiver off. As soon as the lights returned, 'Shepard' looked at EDI and nodded.

"_Returning security protocols to on,_" EDI replied as 'Shepard' burst into smoke and revealed a smirking Naruto in his place, "_I don't think the Commander will approve of your impersonation, Naruto._"

"It doesn't matter what he thinks, EDI," Naruto said with a smirk, "Because I'm sure he enjoys talking to the Illusive Man just as much as Joker likes to share his ship with you."

"_Mr. Monroe fails to realize that we make an adapt team,_" EDI said, _"And your response is rather logical. Commander Shepard often seems tense after speaking to the Illusive Man._"

"It's cuz the guy freaks him out," Naruto said as he walked to the elevator, "More like the eyes do. What are they anyway? Cyber-implants?"

"_Classified._" EDI replied robotically before speaking somberly, "_It seems that data has been locked from my 'consciousness'._"

"Meh, you'll get through those firewalls sooner or later," the blonde said as he pressed the button for his deck, "Room Security Footage?"

"_No Security Footage recorded,_" EDI informed him, "_There are also no traces of any tampering with your additional cameras or your personal console. Mr. Monroe and I have been sure to monitor them occasionally and Grunt has them deactivated whenever he does his rounds, we have the Secondary Footage showing him doing so._"

"Thanks EDI," Naruto said with a nod as he walked to his room, "Ya know, play your cards right and I might just leak more of your personality into VI-Kichi."

"_As Dr. Chakwas has said to you, 'Flattery will get you nowhere,'_" EDI replied, using a voice clip she recorded of the day before. Naruto nodded thankfully before sitting on his bed and pulling a vial of the fluids from Ino Shimura's pod out. He contemplating giving this and his recorded information to Mordin, but he had a feeling VI-Kichi had already uploaded the data to the Salarian geneticist.

"_Yo, Naruto! Mordin wants to talk to you,"_ Joker's voice rang out through the decks followed by EDI's computerized voice, _"Commander, Jacob would like a word with you in the armory."_

"Thanks Joker!" Naruto called back, leaving to the Salarian doctor's lab no sooner after his name was called.

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 2 is complete. Sorry about the wait. READ AND REVIEW.<strong>


	3. Chapter 3

**AN: Response to review from Griff: Thank you for enjoying the story, and as I mentioned before, Naruto's time between his 'revival' and **_**ME2**_** will be explained as we go. As a not-really-an-answer answer to keep you satisfied; Kakashi indulged himself in Jiraiya's books to keep from dwelling on the harsh realities of his lifestyle, perhaps this will help you understand that mercenaries do the same. Some **_**really**_** enjoy their jobs, these are the insane ones, but others (like our blonde hero) enjoy life to escape the realities.**

* * *

><p><em><strong>Normandy's<strong>_** Armory, Widow Nebula, Year 2185**

"You wanted to talk, Jacob?" Shepard asked as the doors to the armory hissed open and the Commander walked in. The dark skinned biotic looked up from his spot at the armory's computer with a slightly distressed look on his face.

"It's...nothing important Commander," Jacob said, standing and walking over to examine a rifle on the assembling table, "Just a personal issue."

"It has to be something if you wanted to talk about it," Shepard countered as he leaned against the wall and crossed his arms, "Besides, if it affects my crew's morale, I need to know about it."

"You're a real piece of work, Commander," Jacob chuckled out with a shake of his head as he set the rifle down and looked at his superior, "But, I get your point. Look, it's a past issue resurfaced and I don't know if it's legitimately important but on the off-chance it is-"

"Jacob, you're part of my crew and if I can help in anyway, just ask," Shepard said with a shake of his head, "Now spill it. What's bugging you?"

"Right to the chase," the Cerberus biotic said as he looked evenly at the Spectre, "Ok, look. My dad was an Alliance First Officer on a ship that went missing about fifteen years ago. He taught me everything that I know today."

"Let me take a shot in the dark: You got information providing a location for your father's vessel and now you wanna check it out, right?" Shepard asked. Jacob snorted and crossed his arms.

"Were you a detective in a past life or something?" he asked the strawberry blonde, earning a shrug in response, "Yeah, someone sent me the location of the VI-issued distress beacon of my father's ship."

"Is it legitimate?" Shepard asked the Cerberus Biotic.

"I've run it through several checks to signals and codes imbedded in my father's previous messages..." he said with a nod before heavily sighing, "And...they match."

"Shouldn't we leave this to the Alliance?" asked the Spectre.

Jacob snorted in displeasure, "If I left anything to the Alliance, I would be dead by now. I gotta do this on my own, see my father with my own eyes; whether he's dead or alive."

"That's understandable, Jacob," Shepard said with a nod, "Give me the coordinates and I'll get you there."

"You don't have to do that, Commander," the man said while rubbing his neck, "I could handle it on my own and be back before you make the jump."

"If it concerns my crew, it concerns me, Jacob," Shepard said with a small grin, "Keep trying to back me out of things and I'll keep hitting you with that cheesy line."

"Heh, you make a good argument, Shepard," the biotic replied before grinning back, "Alright. Here, these are the coordinates of the VI's distress beacon. I've gotta make some quick personal calls..."

"Say no more," Shepard said, taking the offered small datapad and walking out of the Armory and towards the Lab to check on Naruto and Mordin. He was confused as to why the Salarian Doctor would want to talk to the blonde assassin, but as he thought about that, he thought about how the blonde refused to talk to the Yeoman, Kelly Chambers, who acted as the ship's personal psychiatrist.

"_If I'm gonna share my problems with anybody, it's going to be some drunken jackass I'll kill in a fight, or the next chick I wake up next to with a hangover. No fucking mind-doctor of yours is gonna get in my head, Shepard!"_ Naruto had said after storming into Shepard's personal quarters after receiving a third request to talk from Yeoman Chambers. The blonde exploded into smoke immediately afterwards, the technique he called Ka-gay Boo-shin was starting to get on the Spectre's nerves, and had caused the strawberry blonde to wonder about his choice in accepting Naruto's help.

* * *

><p>"...Need to hurry. Excuse you," Mordin Solus said as Naruto sneezed. The Salarian offered him a tissue while continuing, "Shepard has enough problems. Believe you are more...open-minded to my work, anyway."<p>

"Thanks Doc," the blonde replied, taking the offered tissue with a nod and blowing his nose before continuing, "But I wouldn't count Shepard out so fast. Guy's pretty decent, so Joker's said anyway, and he gives off the vibe of a man you can count on."

"Indeed," Mordin said, "But has past issues with many unnecessary deaths, could be nuisance to my problem."

"I see your point," Naruto mumbled, tossing the used tissue in the trash and then placing his germ-free hand on his chin. They both looked at the door when the doors opened and the man they had been discussing walked in. Naruto blinked before grinning and looking back at the Salarian.

"Well, well, well..." Naruto said with a grin, "Looks like you could ask him yourself. If he turns you down, you know where to find me."

"I do. Thank you, Fox," Mordin said with a small smile. The blonde grinned and walked out towards the CIC, hearing the Salarian begin to explain his problem to Shepard. Naruto dropped his smile as he entered the CIC and a red-headed woman stood before him with her arms crossed, two Cerberus grunts standing behind her with rifles ready. The blonde sighed and crossed his arms.

"So..." Naruto began, "Shepard finally gave you the 'Go Ahead' then?"

"No," a female voice with a slightly British accent said from his left, making Naruto turn and blink as Miranda continued, "I did, though."

"_You_ don't run the ship, Babe," the blonde mercenary shot back with narrowed eyes, "And unless Shepard orders it...nah, fuck that. Even _if_ he ordered it, I'd probably kill these two saps the kind Yeoman here would try to restrain me with and shove em into the airlock. The amount of time it would take depends on them."

"You have a very dark sense of humor," Kelly said, speaking with a frown on her face, "You've seen many things, haven't you?"

"Sweetheart, that's an understatement that would take hours to correct," Naruto snorted out, looking back at her with his yellow eyes before he frowned, "Don't examine me!"

"You're very solitary," Kelly noted, "But you still let a small select few in...EDI, Joker, Mordin, Grunt, Jack..."

"Nobody asked you," Naruto growled as he started to walk around her when one of the Cerberus grunts grabbed his shoulder. Naruto reached over and grabbed the wrist of the offending arm before twisting around and driving his other elbow into the gut of the grunt. The other man hesitated and Naruto grinned at him as the attempting detainer dropped to his knees and held his gut while coughing heavily.

"You want some too, Chuckles?" he asked the man with a sadistic grin. Receiving silence as an answer, Naruto snorted again and began to turn when a cloth covered his mouth and nose. The blonde's yellow eyes widened as he inhaled before they slowly shut, his last conscious thought being, _Chlorophyll...should've seen it...coming...damn..._

* * *

><p>Naruto awoke strapped to a chair in the medical bay, his head throbbing slightly as he blinked the sleep from his eyes. He glanced to his left and frowned when he saw Chakwas and Kelly smiling slightly at him.<p>

"Traitor..." he grumbled to the doctor, earning a laugh from the woman, before he glanced at the redheaded girl and smirked, "You could've told me you're into bondage and playing Doctor before tying me up in a medical chair."

"Flirting won't get you out of this, Naruto," Chakwas said before looking at a blushing young psychologist, "Don't mind him, it's one of his defenses."

"O-Of course," Kelly replied before coughing and clearing her throat, the blush still faintly visible on her cheeks, "Now, I want you to tell me about your life after your term in The Alliance. I know you worked with Lt. Alenko before he and Commander Shepard were even acquainted, maybe you could start with how you had a falling out?"

"Babe told ya that?" Naruto asked with an arched brow, "Don't answer. Tch, Jack was right, she is a Cheerleader. Or a Girl Scout...Hey, Chakwas, is there any woman on this ship _not_ into roleplaying?"

Dr. Chakwas shook her head and stood, looking over her shoulder as she left, "Don't let his words deceive you, Ms. Chambers. He'll open up in time."

"TRAITOR!" Naruto hollered as the doors hissed shut. He gritted his teeth before looking at Kelly with dismay.

"Fine, I'll talk..." he grumbled. The Yeoman smiled slightly and sat back in her chair.

"Start with the day after you left the Alliance, the day that Biotic was killed," Kelly said, opening an electronic notepad. The blonde sighed before closing his eyes and opening them, his eyes becoming cerulean blue. Kelly gasped as she saw resonating sadness, loneliness, and intense hatred within them.

"The day I...returned to my roots," Naruto began before chuckling darkly, "How about I just skip to when I killed him?"

Kelly swallowed and looked at her chart, "T-The reports don't name the killer."

"Fuck the reports! I didn't kill him expertly and leave evidence, or I wouldn't be here right now!" the blonde snarled, making the Yeoman jump in her seat, "I killed him that night, when everyone thought I was packing in my room. It was my Kage Bunshin-"

"Your duplicate ability?" Kelly asked, earning an annoyed glare from the man.

"No, that's my turtle's name," he snapped back, "Yes! God, can I please continue without interruption?"

"S-Sorry," Kelly stuttered out. The now blue eyed shinobi muttered under his breath before shaking his head.

"Anyway," he continued, "My Kage Bunshin was packing for me while I was doing more...practical things with my time. Like finding the holding cell the Alliance put that baka of a biotic. Oh I found him, eventually...It cost three Turbian C-Sec members their lives, and I do feel bad about them. Only slightly, though."

"O-Ok," the redheaded Yeoman quietly said before taking a calming breath and looking at the blonde, "What about your childhood? Did you ever have a problem with your parents?"

Naruto's eyes squeezed shut and he turned away before looking back and making Kelly gasp again at the intense red boring into her gaze.

"Release me. This interview is over." He growled, the red eyes with the four-stared pupils becoming very intimidating to the Yeoman. Kelly gulped and wrote a quick sub-note on her pad before pressing the release button.

No faster than a second later, the redheaded woman was against the wall, struggling against the grip on her throat. Naruto's eyes were narrowed and glaring into hers, making her regret her decision about asking him of his parents. The blonde merc kept his glare before releasing her throat and letting her drop to her knees. Kelly rubbed her neck and froze when the boots of the violent merc appeared in her line of sight.

"Yeoman..." he started making her slowly look up at him, "You've crossed the line. This is my only warning. Stay away from me, and my past. Am I understood, _Chambers_?"

"Y-Yes sir," Kelly whimpered out. The blonde grinned and snapped his fingers.

* * *

><p>"She's waking up!" Miranda announced to the gathered crew as Kelly slowly sat up and held her head, "Yeoman Chambers, are you ok?"<p>

"w-What happened?" Kelly asked as she looked around. The two men that had been chosen to assist her in forcefully interviewing the mercenary known as Naruto were assisting her to her feet and a concerned pair of yellow eyes came into her line of vision.

"You just suddenly passed out," Naruto said, putting his hand against her head, "She has a slight fever. Better take her down to the Doc."

"But I...we...I...it was a dream?" Kelly whispered out. Naruto frowned again and looked at Miranda.

"Fainting and fevers? Those are signs of overworking her mind if I'm right," he informed her, "Tell Chakwas I think she's just exhausted. Give her a day off to rest in the med bay."

"I'll leave that to the doctor, thank you very much," Miranda said with a frown before helping Kelly walk to the elevator. The surrounding group dispersed just as a smile came over the merc's face. He chuckled and walked towards the cockpit.

"Man, I love genjutsu," the blonde quietly said with a smile as his eyes flashed red. The blonde strolled into the cockpit and collapsed in the chair belonging to the co-pilot that was never assigned to this ship. A grinning man with a beard looked over at him.

"Geez, took ya long enough," Joker said. Naruto glanced at the pilot with a grin of his own.

"Hey, blame the genius 'Illusive Man' that put Chambers on this ship," he countered before going into a thinking pose, "I think there might have been an alternative reason for Chambers' recruitment...one for a more..._sensual_ reason, perhaps?"

"Dirty-dirty, Mr. Fox," Joker chuckled out before scowling as another block came onto his view screen, "Goddamn it...You sorry excuse for a virus! Stop sending me conformation requests!"

"_Mr. Monroe, we wouldn't be interfacing in a negative manner if you'd please stop acting without discussing it with me first,"_ The blue orb said as it popped up. Naruto snickered.

"You two are like an old married Salarian couple," the blonde said with a grin, "EDI, knock it off with the emails, they're disruptive."

"_I beg to differ, Naruto,"_ The AI countered, reappearing on his right, _"I find them to be informative on a different manner...plus, it persuades Mr. Monroe to talk to me. Now, if only I can get him to stop with the oil..."_

"What's wrong with a little decorating?" Joker countered, earning a laugh from the merc. The two were continuously chastised by the AI for their carefree and bitter humorous ways. In response, Naruto spewed a bit of sludge from his throat at the AI, making EDI actually sputter while Joker broke down laughing, tears pouring from his eyes.

* * *

><p>Later, Naruto found himself called to the Comms Room, where he found Shepard, Miranda, Grunt, Kasumi, Mordin, Jacob, Jack and of course, Garrus waiting for him. The Turian watched him with a suspicious eye and Jacob with a narrowed glare, the latter also reaching to his neck, showing he hadn't forgotten Naruto's actions. Naruto ignored Jacob's gesture, but he took note of it. He crossed his arms and jumped to the ceiling, sitting on it comfortably and disturbing a few watching him as he defied the laws of physics.<p>

"So what's up, Shepard?" Naruto asked, voicing everyone's thoughts in the room, "There a smoking hot princess that needs to be saved, cuz if so, I have dibs."

Shepard allowed a small smile to grace his face, not denying the blonde's wit kept tense moments low while aboard the ship (unless he was the cause of course), before he spoke, "Well, since you offered, then you can assist Kasumi."

Naruto blinked and looked at the thief, who looked away from his gaze, a small blush on her features, before he looked back at the Spectre with a grin, "The boss is ordering me to take Kat-chan on a date? Epic win!"

"Yeah, well, while you're having all the fun, Miranda and I are going to help Jacob with some personal issues in the Alpha Draconis System," the Commander of the Cerberus ship said, "I want everyone else to keep on their toes while I'm off ship. We're still at 'War' people, even if the Alliance or the Council won't acknowledge it. Be safe, be careful, and above all, don't die."

"You remind me of one of my old teachers," Naruto chuckled out before dropping to the ground and landing next to a startled Kasumi. He wrapped his arm around her shoulder and grinned at her, "So what's the problem, Kat-chan?"

"Stop calling me that," Kasumi muttered as she slipped out of his grip and left the Comms Room. Naruto looked back at Shepard with a smirk.

"She digs me," he joked, making Grunt and Jack chuckle, before he turned and followed the thief. As soon as he left the Comms Room he made a mad dash for the elevator, barely catching it with his hand and entered it with Kasumi. The thief stepped to the side and hugged her arms in an effort to make herself smaller as she stood in the corner.

Naruto leaned on the other wall before banging on it twice with his fist. EDI popped up in the elevator and the blonde merc looked at her, "Shut it down. No audio on the camera."

"_Done, need anything else?"_ EDI asked, earning a shake of the head as a response. The AIs image vanished and Naruto looked at Kasumi.

"You're going after _Hock_, aren't you?" he asked quietly. Kasumi remained silent and so he continued, "I'm not going to lie and jump into this blindly, Kat-chan-"

"Stop...Stop calling me that," Kasumi mumbled. Naruto sighed and rested his head against the wall.

"Keiji really did ask me to take care of you, Kat-chan," the blonde said, earning her attention, "He wanted you to have something."

Naruto reached into his jacket and tossed a small rectangular device to her. The hooded thief blinked as she coughed it before examining it in her hands, finding a red button on the bottom. She pressed the button and a holographic Asian man appeared before her. His smile kind and loving nearly caused her to break out in tears, she did however gasp and covered her mouth with one hand.

"_Kasumi...If you're watching this without me, then I've been killed and Naruto managed to give you the two things I asked him to. If you're watching this and I'm next to you, then we must be really, really drunk off our asses,_" the man said with a grin, making Kasumi fight the pain as she released a small laugh. The man sighed before becoming serious, "_Kasumi...Naruto told me how you met. It was before you had met me and only a few days before our arranged heist. You need to move on from being ashamed, Kasumi. You can forgive yourself and move on or you could always join some stranger with a couple of drinks while feeling sorry for yourself *chuckles*. I'll support your choice; I always have and always will. I love you, Kasumi._"

"I love you too, Keiji-kun..." Kasumi whispered as a lone tear trailed down her cheek and she looked back at the blonde, only to find a lone falling leaf in his place. A moment later, the elevator started up again and the master thief squeezed the small device in her hands before watching the video again.

* * *

><p><em>I should have given that to her during our first interaction,<em> Naruto mused as he watched from his makeshift chair as Kasumi entered the shuttle bay. She wiped furiously at her eyes before beaming a smile up to Naruto, who was sitting on a box labeled, "CAUTION: Dangerous Chemicals!"

"Thank you, Naruto-kun," Kasumi quietly thanked him. Naruto grinned back and his eyes shut, giving him a foxy appearance and making the thief blush.

"No problem, Kat-chan," he said with a grin before his smile turned predatory, "Let's go get that son of a Rachni, shall we?"

"Hai," Kasumi said with a nod. The two entered the spare shuttle that was in the bay, Naruto grimacing when he looked in the back and saw a suit.

"You're not really planning an undercover heist are you?" Naruto asked "That's so cliché!"

"Who's the master thief here?" Kasumi shot back, making the yellow eyed merc grumble about 'Not Fair'. The thief giggled, her laugh not seeming as withdrawn as it was before, before starting the engines and taking to the empty space above the planet Bekenstein. Reluctantly, Naruto climbed into the back and sealed his current clothes into his shoulder before he began pulling the fancy formal outfit on.

"Don't think I can't see you looking in the mirror, Kat-chan!" Naruto said with a smirk when he glanced up and caught her watching him. The thief blushed and looked straight ahead, ignoring the grunts and groans coming from the blonde.

"I-I was making sure you didn't rip it!" Kasumi shouted back, her face glowing with a faint pink tint.

"Yeah, sure, that's what they all say," Naruto grumbled as he climbed back into the front of the shuttle, "So, who's the Hack got covering his scrawny ass this time?"

Kasumi looked at him for a moment before smiling and looking ahead, "You should wear formal wear more often."

"Is that an offer?" the blonde shot back with a small grin. Kasumi couldn't resist grinning back and replying, "Maybe...if you're good."

"I'll be good," Naruto chuckled out before crossing his arms, "So what's the plan?"

"Well, you to go in alone while I take the security out and we'd meet up in the vault," Kasumi replied, "where a lovely statue of the late Saren will be waiting, stocked with several weapons of our choice and some extra armor."

"Tch, armor-shmarmor," Naruto scoffed off with a wave of his hand as she descended the vehicle towards Donovan Hock's private manor. Rather, one of Donovan Hock's many private manors. Naruto looked at Kasumi as they docked and a chauffeur walked up to them.

"My cover?" he asked.

"Solomon Gunn," Kasumi shot back as the cockpit opened and the two exited, Naruto walking ahead of Kasumi and subtly casting a genjutsu over her. He was greeted personally by a man in his mid-forties, straight and narrow black hair and an artist's goatee on his head and cold grey eyes crinkled as he smiled to the newcomer.

"Ah, welcome, welcome," the man said, "I am Donovan Hock, Esquire." Naruto resisted rolling his eyes as Hock continued, "I'm so elated you could make it Mr..."

"Gunn. Solomon Gunn," Naruto replied, taking a friendly approach as he offered the man his hand. Hock glanced down at the hand as though it was a second head before looking up at Naruto expectantly. Naruto retracted his offered hand, coughing to clear the awkwardness, before gesturing to the statue coming up on his left.

"My gift to you," he said, "A statue of the late Saren, rouge Spectre, and a former colleague of yours if I'm correct."

"Herm, perhaps," was the rich-man's reply before one of his servants walked up to him, "Yes Marik?"

"Deepest apologies, sirs, but the statue isn't registering clear on the internal scan," the servant replied, activating his bio-ware and scanning the statue again. Naruto and Kasumi waited through the tense moment, the former releasing a small breath through his nose when Marik looked back up and smiled, "All clear. I'll just wheel it to the vault."

"Please do," Hock said with a nod before smiling and patting Naruto at the shoulder, "Come Mr. Gunn! Join in the festivities."

"Gladly!" Naruto replied with a smile as they entered the building and Kasumi activated her cloaking device, following back behind them.

* * *

><p>"Shit...that's one mess I wouldn't wanna clean up," Jacob said as he, Miranda and Shepard walked towards a wrecked Alliance cruiser, partially beached on the shore of the planet Aeia, "So this is it...The MSV Hugo Gernsback."<p>

"Probably looked better when it was docked," Shepard commented, holstering his sidearm, "There's the VI that sent the distress signal. Shall we?"

"Yeah..." Jacob said, walking towards it and collapsing his shotgun before placing it on his back. As they approached the VI, Jacob spoke, "Hey! What's the purpose of this Unit?"

"_VI purpose r-reactivated to s-s-send out distress b-b-beacon, ten days, fifteen hours, and seven minu-minu-minutes ago,_" the VI replied. Shepard crossed his arms.

"Two weeks? That's a bit recent, isn't it?" he asked the VI, "When did the crash occur."

"_Crash of MSV Hugo Gernsback occurred ten years, three months, two weeks, six days, and seventeen hours ago,_" the VI recited.

"And the rescue message was only just sent out?" Miranda commented. Jacob scowled.

"That's not right," the biotic mumbled before addressing the VI, "Who activated the beacon?"

"_Acting Captain Ronald Taylor activated the beacon,_" the machine replied. Jacob seemed confused by this.

"But...My father wasn't the Captain. He wasn't even the next in line for the job," he said, before shaking his head, "Let's investigate the wreckage before we go any further. I wanna make sure we don't miss anything."

"It's your show, Jacob," Shepard said, gesturing to the makeshift bridge connecting the land to the ship wreckage. The biotic nodded thankfully and led the three of them towards the wrecked ship. The team all watched their step as they crossed the rusted-metallic bridge. Miranda scowled upon stepping into the ship.

"Well...this makes things quite difficult, doesn't it?" she asked when they all noticed the stripped walls and broken screens of various computer modules nearly a decade old. Jacob sighed and rubbed his neck.

"This is going to suck..." the biotic groaned out before following his commander's example and going to one of the broken screens.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: To be Continued...Sorry about the shortness, I'll try to make the next chapter longer. PEACE.<strong>

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	4. Chapter 4

**~~Hock Manor, Bekenstein, Year 2185~~**

"So...Do ya think he's compensating for something?" Naruto chuckled out as he looked over the large metal/electron-shielded door standing between them and Keiji's black box. Kasumi giggled at his joke and the blonde grinned back at her. 'Solomon Gunn' looked up at the statue of the rouge Spectre, Saren, making him scoff.

"So Shepard killed this ugly baka, huh?" he mused, walking around the statue before sighing and scratching his head, "Man, wish I wasn't on the assignment with the SB...Fighting a Reaper would've been fun, even if I had to deal with _Alenko_..."

"The 'SB'? Who's that?" Kasumi asked as she examined the door crafted to defend the elevator that'd lead them to her deceased lover's black box while ignoring the growl at the mention of the Alliance lieutenant. Her heart clenched as she thought of Keiji, as it usually did; before she looked at Naruto in an effort to distract herself. The blonde was opening the hidden compartment and getting his supplies out, checking a few kunai for scratches.

"SB stands for Shadow Broker," Naruto replied with nonchalance, as though it was an everyday occurrence to discuss the infamous crime lord/Blackmailer. Naruto felt a stare on his back and looked over his shoulder at his assigned teammate, arching a brow as his golden eyes locked on her wide brown ones, "What?"

"Y-You worked with..."

"_For_," Naruto corrected as he grinned at the astounded thief, "I worked _for _the Shadow Broker, Kat-chan. He paid my quite the hefty sum for my work. Shame about that Salarian though...Ah, well, can't dwell on the past all the time! What're we working with here?"

He asked his question as he walked back to examine the door with her, now dressed in his usual attire, making the thief wonder how he changed clothes without her noticing. Kasumi snapped out of her confused daze and activated her omni-tool with a simple thought, as most did, before 'tsking' in disapproval. She snorted in amusement before she spoke to her partner, "This is just pathetic. While appearing as an 'invulnerable' safe, it really is only made up of a few simple components. Such as the seven inch thick steel door we're looking at."

"The big metal thing is that one, right?" Naruto asked in a smartass manner, earning him a smack upside the head, "I'll take that as a yes..."

"Baka," Kasumi smirked before looking at several small metallic boxes parallel to the safe door with annoyance, "There's a vocal register on the left wall above some sort of obvious lock. The two on the right are DNA and visual registers. Not to mention the electronic shield covering the whole thing. That's not the problem though."

"And here I thought this was going to be a walk through the park. So what's my part, again," Naruto said with a crack of his knuckles, "I gotta get the passcode, right?"

"I highly doubt there is one," the thief mused before sighing, "Then again, with Hock being as paranoid as he is, he probably installed one just because he's a psycho. That and he probably expected me to try and break in, so it was just added to push my buttons."

"Well we can't have that," the blonde sighed out with crossed arms, "I'm the only one allowed to push anything on you, or rather, _in_ you."

"...Pervert..."

"Don't act like you don't love it, Kat-chan." That earned him a hard punch in the shoulder from the blushing thief, "Ow..."

* * *

><p><em><strong>~~MSV Hugo Gernsback <strong>_**interior, Aeia, Year 2185~~**

"This is pointless," Miranda growled out as she tossed a shattered E-Pad aside, "Absolutely nothing was untouched by the crash..."

"I've got a broken audio recording," Shepard said from his spot at a console with a shattered screen, "Nothing clear enough aside from a few sentences concerning a newcomer. Man, ten years..."

"Damn!" Jacob cursed, jumping back as an old screen blew, glass flying through the sky, "There goes my last clue..."

The three suddenly jumped, their military training kicking in as they pulled out their weapons, when they heard what sounded like a gunshot. Shepard and Jacob piled up on the door, the former priming his assault rifle while the latter prepped his shotgun. Miranda waited until Shepard nodded and headed out, her machine pistol steady in her hand as she slowly crossed the bridge forged from scrap. The raven haired biotic stopped at the end of the bridge, keeping her eyes moving before gesturing for Jacob and Shepard to join her.

Shepard and Jacob looked at each other, nodded, and then began moving to Miranda's position. When meeting up with her they began to advance towards the beach, locking their eyes on a random pile of boxes. A tuft of red hair stuck up and a human head popped up shortly afterwards. A female human head that looked slightly malnourished and a little ill.

"Hold your fire," Shepard said as he lowered his weapon, "It's a survivor."

"Who are you?" Jacob asked, approaching the woman, who flinched at his movement.

"Ah, um, came for gatherings before _they_ came," the woman said, "Saw you come from the sky. Sky-fallers. You sky-fallers, yes?"

"Yeah..." Jacob uneasily replied, "You could call us that. Do you know Ronald Taylor?"

"T-Tay-lore?" the woman repeated with a furrowed brow, as though the name was familiar, "Yes...Yes! Tay-lore brought us here, protected us. Until _they_ spoke out against him..."

"You keep mentioning _they_," Shepard said, getting the woman's attention, "Who are _they_?"

"_They_ are the Hunters," the woman whispered, "And they seek to kill us!"

"Hunters that want to kill," Miranda said with an eye roll, "That's certainly a new one..."

"Hilarious Miranda," Shepard deadpanned before looking over at a ridge near the other end of the beach, "Did you hear that?"

"_They_ found me!" the woman whispered fearfully, "The Hunters see me come look for you! Help me!"

"Don't worry, we'll protect you," Shepard reassured her softly before readying his rifle and looking at his squad, "Alright, Jacob; You take a position at those forward containers. Miranda, you take a position on those rocks. Miss, you stay with me behind these containers. Don't move until it's over, ok?"

The woman nodded as Shepard gently lowered her behind the containers, while his team went to their positions. They waited a moment before an incoherent shout got their attentions. Shepard readied himself and took a small intake of breath when the first Hunter ran out, a basic rifle in his hand.

"NOW!" the commander exclaimed, his team unloading rounds at the approaching Hunters. The woman crouched near Shepard screamed in fear and stood to leave, getting the commander's attention.

"No, wait!" cried the concerned Spectre. His cry was too late, as when the woman turned to face him, a blast caught her in the head, killing her instantly. Shepard sighed sadly for a millisecond before looking back at the Hunters and firing with precision.

He'd get answers soon enough, for the woman with no name and for her family that he was certain she had.

* * *

><p><strong>~~Hock's Manor, Bekenstein~~<strong>

"So...I gotta get Hock to yak it up, get some of his DNA, and shut the power to the system down?" Naruto asked as he **henged** his appearance into his formal wear before smirking at a slightly displeased Kasumi, "Aw, Kat-chan's sad she didn't see me naked again, I'm touched! Kat-chan thinks I'm sexy..."

"S-Shut up!" Kasumi embarrassedly hissed as she punched his arm, "Just do what you're told, Naruto-kun..."

"Funny, you didn't say that last time," joked the blonde before a slap across the back of the head made him stop, "Ok! Ok! I'll stop!"

"...Baka..."

"You wound me, Kat-chan!" dramatically exclaimed the blonde merc as he placed a hand over his heart, "Right here..."

"Just go get the bastards voice recorded!" Kasumi barked before she activated her cloaking device. Naruto smiled and put his hands in his henged pockets before walking away from the room. When out of the room, he walked up the stairs and began mingling his way through towards the host.

Donovan Hock.

The last time Naruto encountered this man was when he had to play bodyguard for an heiress. A Salarian heiress, so he wasn't really into the job. Hock was trying to get the heiress to buy some of his company's stock in an effort to build up more control; she did despite her butler/financial advisor's advice, Naruto wasn't sure what the man's official standing was. A week later, Naruto was explaining to the contractor why the heiress was killed in a lynch mob after the planet's stocks plummeted. Many, Naruto included, thought that Hock arranged it all so that he could use the 'pity' ads to get more investments.

"Ah, _Mr. Sullivan_," Hock greeted as the tuxedo-clad blonde approached with a grin, "How are you enjoying yourself?"

"Quite fine, Mr. Hock," the blonde replied as he took a glass from a passing Asari waitress, sipping it before looking at Hock with an arched brow, "Hm, early twenty-first century? Good year."

"The Finest for the finest of people," replied the host with a smug smirk. Naruto swirled the wine as he smirked back.

"_If you wouldn't mind _not_ flirting with him..._" an annoyed Kasumi hissed into his comm. The blonde chuckled and looked over at a pillar where she was hiding, his eyes flashing yellow from their disguised blue. Kasumi jumped in her place slightly as he looked back at Hock. Those eyes were unnerving sometimes, and inviting at others...

"Might I ask just _why_ you are throwing this party?" Naruto inquired to his host, getting a confused look as a response, he continued, "Well, if I may take notice, your stocks have...been falling for a few years now and then out of the blue a party."

"Well I never," Hock growled but was interrupted by a raised hand.

"No, no, you misunderstand," the blonde said placating the man's growing fury, "I merely find it odd, and from one 'benefactor' to another, might I ask _why_ the party is being thrown?"

Hock blinked a few times before understanding crossed his face and he leaned forward and whispered, "Yes, well...let's say I've finally taken care of a little 'infestation' problem that's been affecting my company."

"Ah, celebrations are definitely in order!" Naruto exclaimed, getting the party's attention while he fought the urge to strangle the man due to his referring to his deceased friend as a 'infestation'. Naruto gestured towards an embarrassed Hock, "I was just informed by Mr. Hock that the company's stocks are going to have risen by nearly four-hundred and ten percent by the end of the day!"

The party clapped and hooted, before calming as Naruto raised a hand, "Quiet, let there be quiet! I'm sure our friend and host would love to give a speech...?"

Hock looked at the blonde incredulously before a party attendee started the usual "Speech" chant. Hock recomposed himself quickly and sent a glare at the blonde, who sheepishly shrugged, before he gave a long speech over how 'better we are than normal folk' and how 'the wealth of my friends only increases as our friendships grow'. Basically the usual on the spot speech.

Once the hubbub died down, Hock turned to Naruto with a glare, "If you ever do that again to me tonight, Mr. Sullivan, I will have you escorted out of the party."

"My apologies," the blonde said in feigned sincerity, "I was so surprised by your..._infestation_ problem's resolution that I couldn't control myself...Part of the reasons that my fourth wife divorced me."

"You couldn't control yourself?"

"No," Naruto said with a chuckle, "She called _me_ an infestation problem!"

Hock barked out a laugh, patting the blonde on the shoulder, before walking away. He stopped next to another investor and began another conversation while Naruto went outside. He chuckled as he avoided a pebble being thrown his way by feigning a yawn.

"Now, Kat-chan, that wasn't nice," Naruto whispered into his mic.

"_You got the recording, but did you have to mention an ex-wife and make nice with him?_" Kasumi grumbled back.

"Well, I had to lose any suspicion I might have gained," replied the blonde with a feigned smirk to another investor he met on a previous assignment, "but I didn't think you'd be so jealous, Kat-chan. Besides...I've never been married."

Kasumi muttered in Japanese under her breath as she silently followed her partner, who suddenly stopped by an opening to the lower floors. Naruto looked around before looking right at the cloaked Kasumi with piercing red eyes that nearly caused her to scream in fear. The plus-like pupils being absent as a slit pupil took their place.

"What's wrong, Kat-chan?" Naruto asked as he arched a brow and his normal iris color and pupil shape returned, "See something?"

"What did you just do?" Kasumi asked with a frown, her dark eyes staring at her amused partner with suspicion.

Naruto tapped her nose as he dropped his henge, reverting to his normal 'work' attire, and replied, "A master should never reveal his secrets...especially if one is La Volupe."

"I didn't know you spoke French..." Kasumi mumbled with a small pink tint on her face. Naruto waggled his brows as he casually backed up to the edge of the opening.

"Imagine that, neither did I," he cheekily replied before jumping backwards into the hole, "Catch ya on the flip side, Kat-chan."

* * *

><p><strong>~~Aeia~~<strong>

"Well, that could've ended better," Shepard mumbled as he closed the eyes of one of the dead Hunters, "Find anything?"

"Nothing good here, Commander," Jacob sighed out with a hand on his face before muttering, "Dad, what did you do?"

"Well, let's go see if we can't find out where our mystery woman came from, shall we?" Miranda suggested. Shepard and Jacob nodded and kept their weapons ready in preparation for the worst. The three then ran ahead towards where the Hunters had come from.

"Shit, get down!" Shepard barked as something opened fire on them. The three dropped, Shepard quickly unloaded rounds into the attacker and he was rewarded with the sudden explosion of a security drone. Miranda and Jacob followed their commander's example and made quick work of the opposing drones.

"Well," Miranda said as she got to her feet, "That was...fun."

"Yeah," Jacob scoffed, "It's always a blast when someone decides to use me as target practice."

"Enough chatter," the strawberry blonde said with a small smirk, "Let's go find your dad, Jake."

"Yeah, maybe he can explain why I'm killing psychos and destroying mechs," the biotic grumbled as he followed his friend and superior. The three continued up the path, occasionally taking out a group of security drones along the way, before stumbling across a small camp.

"Ho-ly shit..." Jacob whispered in awe as the occupants looked up. Some recoiled in fear while a few raised weapons at them.

"Well, this is quite the welcoming committee," Miranda murmured quietly as she raised her own weapon in response. Shepard held an open hand up as he lowered his rifle.

"We don't want any trouble," the commander started only to be cut off by a woman that cautiously approached Jacob.

"Y-You have _his_ face," the woman growled, "Why we should trust you?"

Easily deciphering the broken English, Jacob holstered his weapon and raised his hands in surrender, "I don't want trouble...I'm just looking for my Father."

The woman blinked before lowering her weapon slowly, "You're...truth telling."

_Truth telling? Good god what happened to these people?_ Shepard asked himself before stepping forward, "Please...can you tell us how this happened? How you and these people...got here?"

The woman nodded slowly, turning around and leading them into the camp, "Yes. Come...we talk in The Circle."

* * *

><p><strong>~~Hock's Manor, Bekenstein~~<strong>

"You just had to touch the clock radio, didn't you?" Kasumi asked her partner in exasperation as she took cover behind a leather/steel couch as the Eclipse mercs that were alerted to their presence in the room shot at them. Naruto scratched the back of his head nervously.

"Yeah...That's my bad," he said with a chuckle before pulling a small circular device out, "But no worries. Just stay down."

"What are you going to do?" Kasumi asked out of unease as he pressed his thumb onto the device's center. Blades popped out along half the edge of the device and Naruto grinned at her, his eyes taking on a mischievous gleam.

"Remember the movie we saw that night?" he asked, making her blush as the night before she met Keiji was one of her favorite memories. When she nodded the blonde grinned, "Let's just say I was inspired by the 'classic' film."

Naruto quickly hopped up and tossed the small bladed device like one would throw a discus or small hoop. The Blue Suns took no notice to this and continued to fire on their position before the two were decapitated by the circling device. Naruto's right hand shot up and caught the weapon without harming himself. He pressed the center again and the blades retracted. Storing the weapon away, he looked at the awed Kasumi and grinned.

"Yeah, I made the Predator Shuriken," Naruto said with a shrug, "I was inspired."

"...I want one," Kasumi said, making the blonde merc chuckle as they both stood to resume their search. Naruto found a datapad and whistled twice to get the thief's attention.

"Lookie here," he said, waving the object in his hand once he got the girl's attention, "Ole Donny's been busy."

Kasumi rolled her eyes and took the datapad from the merc, scanning it with her Omni-tool. With a happy ping, the thief looked at her blonde friend with a smirk, "Well...that just leaves the security code."

"I'm thinking the honcho of this band of Suns has it," Naruto replied as he went to one of the headless Eclipse mercenaries' corpses and searched it. After a moment, he stood and exclaimed, "Bingo! Distress beacon."

"Must you press it?" Kasumi groaned as the blonde twirled it around in his fingers. He hummed and his thumb hovered over the activation button.

"...Yes!" Naruto replied with a smile as he pressed it and a silent alarm triggered in the Blue Suns' Omni-tools. Kasumi shook her head and activated her cloaking device, jumping away while the blonde sat down between the two bodies. The door was kicked open and a small team of heavily armed Eclipse mercs rushed in, a redheaded woman leading them.

Naruto's eyes widened and he allowed sweat to fall down the side of his head as the woman looked at him with wide eyes.

"Hi, Roe-chan!" Naruto greeted while internally he was thinking, _It just had to be Roe-chan...Why? Why is it that the one woman I fucked over, literally and figuratively, is in charge of the Eclipse mercs here? Why God?_

"I should shoot you now," Roe growled, "Just for what you did to me..."

"N-Now come on, Roe-chan..." Naruto replied nervously as he willed himself to stay put, "I-It's not entirely my fault that nothing else...erm, _fits_."

Kasumi watched with an arched brow at the turn of events she was witnessing. Roe, whoever she was, had her pistol locked on Naruto's sweating head. And even though they had spent one night together, Kasumi was confused as to how the blonde 'wrecked' the redhead when she turned out fine.

Roe remained silent before looking at the man next to her, "Go back, inform Hock that everything's fine and resume your normal patrols."

"M-Ma'am?" the Eclipse merc asked questionably. Roe's eyes narrowed dangerously and he swallowed before nodding. He looked to his fellow mercs and said, "You heard her! Let's go!"

The Eclipse mercs left the room and, once she heard the second set of doors hiss shut, Roe jumped the blonde. Naruto and Kasumi felt their eyes bug out of their head when she suddenly kissed the blonde merc passionately.

"Oh god," Roe groaned once the kiss broke and she started grinding her hips against Naruto's waist, "I need it...two years is too damn long..."

"Uh...Roe-chan, you are being paid to head security..." the blonde merc shut up when a pistol was pressed against his head.

"Fuck Hock's orders!" Roe snarled as she pushed him down on his back, "I've been waiting too damn long for this. Do you know that not even an Asari can get me off? I've tried everything short of tracking you down."

"Heh," Naruto laughed nervously, "How lucky for me..."

"Yeah, lucky," Roe replied in a humorless manner, pressing the heating weapon barrel against the side of Naruto's head before sternly ordering, "Undress. NOW."

* * *

><p><strong>~~Aeia~~<strong>

"Thank you," Shepard said to the woman that had given them the datapad with the first three month's logs post-crash, "We'll find him."

"And I'll kill him," Jacob growled as he clenched his fist, "This man isn't my father. Not anymore..."

"Jacob, you need to relax," Miranda said, placing a hand on her friend's shoulder, "We'll get answers."

"Damn right we will," the biotic growled as they left the camp. Shepard stored the datapad in his built-in storage unit before activating his com-link.

"Joker, I need you to contact the alliance and have them send a medical ship to Aeia," the strawberry blonde said as he led his team onward, "We've got hysterical people, so tell them it's a level 3 priority."

"_*zzt* Yes, sir, Commander. Oh, here's a head's up. Kelly wants to talk to you when you get back. Joker out,_" the pilot of the _Normandy II_ said. Shepard sighed quietly before looking to his current team.

"Alright, the alliance should be sending a medical team out here to help them," he said, making Jacob release a sigh of relief. The commander noted that and decided to have Jacob talk to Kelly after he did when they got back. He pulled his Victory rifle out and primed it, Jacob getting his shotgun ready while Miranda readied her machine pistol. They moved in a triangular formation, Shepard leading, and paused when they came across fresh human corpses and a destroyed camp. A speaker system activated.

"_Thank god. They've gone rogue!_" an older man's voice said over the system, "_My security drones are malfunctioning and killing everyone after I tried to reprogram them to defend us against Them._"

"He must mean the hunters," Miranda noted. Jacob scowled and readied his shotgun, firing at an approaching mech and destroying it with a single shot.

"That's my dad's voice," Jacob said with distain, "But he's lying. He reprogrammed them alright. He's trying to cover up his tracks!"

"We don't know that, Jacob," Shepard sternly said before kicking a crate open, "Here, ammo boxes. Reload and save some. I doubt they malfunctioned, so let's be ready for anything."

"Yes sir/Right," Miranda and Jacob replied with nods, gathering the ammo they could before a small group of five drones started to open fire. Jacob took position behind the crates while Miranda and Shepard dropped to their knees to take out the attackers.

"Jacob, we got a grenade left?" Shepard asked over the gunfire. The African-American looked at his commander before grinning with a nod.

"You could say that, sir! Give me a sec," the biotic replied, focusing on the last drone and extending his arm out. He crushed his hand and pulled the drone forward so that it stood between the four others. Releasing his hold over the mech, Jacob dropped to the ground along with Shepard and Miranda before the mech exploded, the biotic overload causing its internal drive to self-destruct, and destroyed the four other mechs. The squad stood, Shepard and Miranda looking over at Jacob in approval.

"Nicely done," Miranda complemented. The biotic smirked back at his friend before looking at the smiling strawberry-blonde.

"Come on, then," Jacob said as he went onward, "I wanna have a 'Father-Son' heart to heart..."

* * *

><p><strong>~~Hock's Estate, Bekenstein~~<strong>

After a forty minute delay, Naruto and Kasumi were in the elevator towards Hock's personal collection. Neither were looking at the other and an awkward silence filled the room.

Until Naruto broke the silence when he spoke, "So...Did you enjoy the show?"

Kasumi's face flushed bright red and she looked away, "Shut up."

"Aw, come on, Kat-chan!" Naruto said with a smug smile as he interlocked his hands behind his head, "You know you liked it...you're curious now, right? 'Did he stick the whole thing in me? Why did Keiji still get me off? How am I not addicted to that masterful prick?' Ow!"

"You're pushing your luck, Naruto..." Kasumi growled after punching the blonde in the ribs, her dipped head hiding her furious blush. Naruto chuckled before looking at Kasumi.

"Well...I'll answer one anyway," he said, making her growl, "Keiji got ya off because he's just a wee bit smaller than me. Not by much...but just enough."

"..."

"Aw, Kat-chan's so cute when she's embarrassed–OH!" Naruto fell to his knees cupping himself before whimpering, "Kat-chan's so mean..."

"Naru-baka's a pervert," grumbled the now flushed Kasumi as she looked away.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: WHOO! Got chapter four done! And now to begin chapter five! Hopefully I won't make you wait half a millennium...unless you like it like that...<strong>

**OH GOD! MASS EFFECT 3 COMES OUT IN 5 DAYS!**

**Review if you want me to continue...cuz if you don't I'm going to be camping outside GameStop for my collector's edition.**

**PEACE.**


	5. Chapter 5

**~~Hock Manor, Bekenstein, Year 2185~~**

"Damn..." Naruto whistled as he and Kasumi entered Donovan Hock's private collection. Currently the blonde was walking around and glancing at several items while Kasumi was looking for her deceased lover's grey box. The blonde merc hummed as he walked past the statue of David when something caught his attention.

_No way..._ the blonde thought with wide eyes as he leapt over the barrier on the upper display level and landed in front of a glass case. His hands pressed against it and he went slack jawed at the tattered headband that had two small horns and faded ink barely making out the kanji for 'Oil'.

The merc whispered sadly as he traced his hand down the glass slowly, "Ero-sennin..."

With a scowl, the blonde brought his fist back and shattered the safety glass that stood in his way. A siren filled the area just as Kasumi picked up Keiji's grey box. The master thief glanced over at where the blonde was as he was taking something from a display case.

"What are you doing?" the thief hissed as she approached. Naruto's red eyes locked on her and she fought the urge to recoil under the gaze before noticing the headband clutched tightly in his right hand.

Before she could ask what it was, the elevator opened and a small squad of Eclipse troops walked in. Donovan Hock appeared over them in an enlarged holographic head, his face sneering.

"_Ah...Miss Goto,_" the Hologram spoke with a scowl, "_I thought I made the message clear not to trifle with me when I took care of your lover..._"

Kasumi looked away and fought the tears down when a dark chuckle hit her ears. She looked at the mercenary and stepped back as a red energy began surrounding him.

"Ya know Hock, you remind me of an old War Hawk I knew..." Naruto said as he slowly turned to the Hologram, a grin forming on his face as black eyeliner started to appear on his face, "That bastard...Played with people like he was king of the world...hated emotions, too. You probably would've liked him. However, you're just stupid enough to hurt my precious people..."

Kasumi blushed heavily at Naruto's proclamation of her being one of his precious people. The blonde lifted the headband in his hand and tied it over his head. A blue light flashed beneath the headband and Naruto rolled his neck before pulling one of his kunai out.

"Kat-chan...**stay**," he sternly ordered with a deeper voice. Too afraid of the blonde at the moment, the thief nodded and Naruto released a low growl before vanishing in a blur of red.

The nearest Eclipse merc cried out in anguish and his nearby teammates looked back at the blonde holding the yellow armored man's head in and extended hand, his cloak splattered with the blood that shot from his kill's neck. Kasumi's face lost all color as Naruto glanced over his shoulder at the horrified holographic face of Donovan Hock. His eyes were glowing red, no sign of an iris or pupil in the glowing orbs.

"**Who's next?"** Naruto asked with a snarl, his voice having an almost demonic taint to it. The Eclipse soldiers slowly backed away, one of them turning around and fleeing with a girlish scream. The blonde snarled and vanished in a flash of red, reappearing in their only exit route.

"_Kill him! I'll double your pay if you do!_" Hock said before his hologram ended. The Eclipse mercs raised their rifles, prepared to kill the man before them as their greed beat down their fear.

**"You have until I count to three to get those rifles out of my face!"** Naruto growled, crossing his arms as a red energy began encasing his body.

**"One..."**

The Eclipse mercs held their ground and began priming their weapons.

**"Two..."**

The mercs took as step forward and their fingers pulled the triggers. Naruto vanished in a haze of red before reappearing behind the merc standing to the far right, his left hand gripping the neck of the Salarian merc tightly.

**"Dead."** Growled out the glowing blonde as he ripped the spinal column out of the evolved amphibian's body, making the merc gasp before falling forward. The red eyed blonde looked over to the frozen Kasumi with a saddened frown, **"...Look away, Kat-chan..."**

He didn't see her fail to meet his 'command', mostly because he had vanished again and snapped the Asari Vanguard's neck around one-hundred and eighty degrees. Naruto hazed out of sight once again and appeared between the last two his arms around their shoulders as he stood casually between them, his head dipped down. They were frozen in fear, although their faces were hidden by the death-helmets issued to the lower ranked, non-specialized mercs.

**"Your first mistake was signing up," **Naruto said coolly, his voice still having the demonic tint to it, **"Your second was taking the job. Your last mistake was letting me ramble."**

He backed away and slid the two larger-than-norm kunai in both hands into a holster he had on the back of his hip. The two mercs simultaneously reached for the deep cuts in their throats before falling down and choking on their own blood. One of the mercs immediately reached for the medi-gel dispenser that was nearby, scooting himself towards it while his counterpart merely clutched hopelessly at this throat. Just as the one attempting to survive touched the dispenser, Naruto casually chucked a shuriken behind him, impaling the merc through the head as the energy shields or biotic barriers most had constantly active did little to deflect the metallic weapons in the blonde's arsenal.

Naruto walked to Kasumi and reached out to lightly grab her shoulder, getting an involuntary flinch from the master thief. The blonde frowned in confusion before scowling at himself and looking away as he calmed himself down to return his eyes to the (now normal) golden yellow they were before. The animalistic slits widened and turned into concerned crosses as they locked on the frightened Asian woman.

"Kat-chan..." he said softly, placing a hand on his shoulder that was clean of blood, "That was...unintentional."

"...I...I want answers when we get back to the _Normandy_, Naruto-kun..." Kasumi whispered as he slowly led her out of the room before walking ahead of him, trying to make sense of what she had seen. Naruto watched her move ahead before forming several clones with a small snap of his fingers. He looked at them with narrowed eyes.

"Move ahead of her and kill them all. Spare no one," he ordered. The clones nodded and vanished in yellow blurs. Naruto sighed before the faint sound of screams and blaster fire echoed in his mind. Putting his hands in his pockets, he casually strolled after the quiet Kasumi.

"...So how do you think Shepard is doing?" He asked once he was alongside the hooded woman.

* * *

><p><strong>~~Outside Ronald Taylor's Base, Aiea, Year 2185~~<strong>

"_I can't get them to stop! Listen, you'll have to kill them to get through to me,_" the voice of Ronald Taylor said as Shepard, Miranda, and Jacob were forced to take cover by a set of upturned steel containers when a large Mech and several 'Hunters' opened fire on him. Shepard frowned at the senior Taylor's voice while Jacob outwardly scowled.

"My ass he can't stop them!" growled the young biotic, popping out of cover to shoot the mech and get some of its' fire off of Miranda's position so she could take out the approaching 'brain-dead' soldiers, before looking at his CO, "That bastard's trying to cover up for his mistakes! This man ain't my father..."

"Jacob, you need to stay focused!" Shepard barked, quickly whipping his pistol out and punching a hole through an approaching man's head with a single shot, "We'll get answers as soon as we can."

"Right...Sorry, Commander," Jacob apologized before using his biotics to grab the now weakened mech and lift it into the air, "Come over and say hello to my gun barrel you waste of money!"

He shot the mech's head clear off and tossed the body at a huddled group of the mind-altered men before it exploded. The men hiding behind an overturned truck cried out in anguish when the mech blew up, sending them flying from their cover and into unconsciousness as they collided with the rock walls that surrounded the valley. Jacob and Shepard held their positions until Miranda gaze them the all clear, "The enemies have been neutralized, it's safe to move onward, Jacob."

Shepard and Jacob popped out to examine the downed men, Shepard sighing when he looked at the one he killed, checking the pockets and finding a set of dog tags, "Search them for tags! When we get this man, I'm turning him over to the Alliance...Sorry Jacob."

"That's if I don't shoot him, Shepard," replied the man in question with a sneer. They gathered what they could find before moving onward, meeting no resistance.

Eventually, they came to a small camp that had a cliff overlooking the vast ocean seen from the atmosphere. Pacing atop a makeshift platform was a skinny, older, dark-skinned man in a red uniform. He looked up at their approach and a look of relief crossed his face.

"Thank god! You made it," he said with a sigh as Shepard approached in front, Jacob hiding behind him to get a look at the man, "Capt. Ronald Taylor, and it's damned good to meet you...?"

"Commander Wade Shepard," the former Alliance soldier replied coldly as he brushed past the greeting man to overlook the ocean, "Nice view..."

"Er, yeah...Did you get them all?" He asked, glancing back at the arch of a constructed entry-way, giving Miranda a longer once-over than she would've liked, before looking back at the stewing strawberry-blonde, "I was afraid they'd come for me. I'm...I'm the only one left. The others all lost their minds after eating the native food."

"Yeah, must have been hell what with the harem you got out of it," Jacob sneered at the man he was supposed to see as his father. Ronald glanced at his (unknown) son with an annoyed frown before looking back at Shepard.

"You always let your subordinates talk down on their superiors, _Commander_?" asked the stranded man with the frown still on his face. Shepard closed his eyes to mentally calm himself before he spoke.

"If it helps me do a better job leading them, then I let them put me in my place from time to time," answered the Spectre, "But it shouldn't bother you since my 'subordinate' happens to be someone you should know well...Right, Jacob Taylor?"

"Jacob?" repeated Ronald with confusion before realization came over his face and his face became one of dread as he slowly looked back at his son, "No...No, not you..."

"What's wrong, _Dad_?" Jacob asked, stepping into his father's space with a scowl as the man flinched under his accusing gaze, "Can't face me after you had a taste of heaven for the past fifteen years?"

"Jacob...I..."

"What, _Captain Taylor_," growled out the angered man, "No excuse? No 'How are you's? Can't say anything to your son after ten damn years of 'Hell'?"

"Jacob, it's not like that..."

"Oh, then what's it like? You just liked playing king for so long that you didn't want to go home to face your queen...She's dead by the way. Third year after you vanished, day after they called the search off. Thanks for the sympathy card, _Pops_," Jacob snorted out as he crossed his arms and stepped back, "So, got anything to say?"

"Jacob, you don't know how hard it is being a leader? It got to me!" Ronald pitifully attempted to win his son back, "They...They looked up to me! I did the best I could with what little I had."

"What little you had?" Miranda scoffed, crossing her arms, "You horded the remaining supplies and created a damn harem with those women...how none of them are pregnant is astonishing!"

"...I...I know," Ronald stated, looking away guiltily. Shepard noticed this and grabbed the man's shoulder, turning him around to glare.

"You know it's astonishing that none of them are pregnant...?" he asked with a small growl. Receiving a hesitant nod from the man, Shepard continued, "Then why do you look so guilty?"

"I..."

"What did you do?"

"We didn't..."

"What. Did. You. _Do?_" Shepard growled as he brought the terrified man close to his face. The Spectre's grey eyes promised unlimited pain as he glared into the older Taylor's own set of brown orbs.

"We...We tied their tubes when they were asleep and drugged!" Ronald answered. Shepard's glare turned hostile and he roughly shoved the man back before stepping away and pressing a button on his coms.

"Joker, I want those ships to have the best doctors on them, this is now a _level five_ problem! Get those ships here yesterday!"

"_Aye-aye, commander!_" Joker replied before he killed the com. Shepard looked back at the father of his current teammate, only to see said teammate holding his shotgun at the man's head.

"Give me a good reason! ONE. GOOD. REASON!" snarled the angered biotic at his terrified father as he pressed the barrel of the gun against Ronald's temple. Shepard moved and shoved the gun down, getting a light glare for his efforts.

"Dammit Jacob, if you kill him, he's getting a way out!" hissed the strawberry-blonde, before looking over at Miranda as she held three 'infected' men at gun point, "Miranda, sit them down and bind them. Mr. Taylor and I have things to discuss with '_Captain_' Taylor."

"Yes commander," Miranda replied with her own hostile glance back at the broken man. Jacob snorted and walked away before Shepard could stop him.

"He's not worth the bullet anyway," Jacob grumbled under his breath as he went back towards the camp's entrance. Ronald followed his son with a saddened glance before his eyes widened and he doubled over in pain with a small cry as Shepard buried his fist into his gut.

"That was for abusing your rank," growled the Spectre before he delivered a blow with his elbow to the back/base of Ronald's neck, "That was for Jacob," his foot implanted itself in the man's side and he snarled, "And that was for fucking around with your crew for the past decade! You'd best hope that the Alliance Committee orders your death...because I'm pushing for life in Orbit...around Saturn!"

Ronald broke into silent tears as the pissed off Spectre glared down at the man before looking up at his hurt teammate with a bit of concern.

_This was not what I wanted him to find..._Shepard mused with a frown before looking at Miranda, who shared his concerned gaze.

* * *

><p><strong>~~Hock's Manor's loading dock, Bekenstein, Year 2185~~<strong>

Kasumi rolled behind cover as Hock fired at her with his one-man, armored fighter while Naruto took out the advancing ranks with his clones. She leapt onto the loading dock, jumping over an approaching missile and pushing off a cargo box before landing on Hock's machine's cockpit. The Scotsman 'noble' sneered at her; she smirked before blowing him a kiss and punching the glass with her omni-tool covered hand, disabling the shields and jumping away as the resulting small explosion damaged the internal structure of the ship.

"Dammit! Hold them off, anyone who kills them gets five times the reward!" Hock ordered as he fought to regain controls over his ship while it plummeted towards the planet's surface.

"Come on, you want some?" A Naruto roared at one of the mercs before brutally slamming his kunai into his head. Another slipped behind a technician after he had activated a drone that would explode within two meters of its quarry, smirking as it vanished in smoke while the drone and its creator died.

The real Naruto was currently utilizing his skill in wall-walking to move against the planet's gravity and walk along the outside of Hock's falling ship. He stood just above Hock's view and watched with a grim face as the rich weapons dealer attempted to bring himself out of the suicide dive Kasumi had put him in. He tilted his head when Hock hit a red button and the ship suddenly lurched to a stop, the sudden halt not jarring his stance in the slightest.

_Well...looks like he's not as stupid as I thought..._mused the blonde as Hock adjusted his flight to climb the mountain side back towards the fight against them. Naruto hardened his gaze on the smirk that graced the man's face, his angered thoughts being, _Smugness will kill you, Hock. You were certain that Keiji would be your last problem, then you went and killed him, hurting Kat-chan. Next you went and had the gull to be the owner of my godfather's headband...meaning you know where his grave is...or you know someone that does and had desecrated it. I'll get my answers._

The ship made it to the top of the mountain and was hovering a good ten meters above the docking station when Naruto made his move. One of the clones leapt at Kasumi and dove behind cover while the rest simultaneously exploded, killing the remaining mercs that dared stand against him...Capt. Roe not being among them.

"Wha...?" the blonde heard Hock say. He smirked and swung his fist back before driving it into the hard glass that defended Hock from most weapons. At the billionaire's shock, the glass cracked, making Naruto scowl.

"Damn diamond-strength glass..." he grumbled before pulling his left fist back and shattering it completely. Hock shielded his eyes with his arms before a hand suddenly grabbed his shoulder roughly while a sudden gust of wind cut him from the safety harnesses that held him in place.

Hock thrashed in his captor's grip before he was dropped to the ground, landing on his feet. The action put too much strain on his legs and they snapped right in the middle of the tibia. Hock howled in pain as he fell to his side, grabbing at his legs as tears fell from his eyes despite his attempts to hold them back. His fighter fell towards the mountain his estate was on before colliding with the rock wall and exploding on impact.

Hock whimpered in pain and rolled onto his stomach to crawl away when a foot suddenly pressed down on his left leg, making him scream in pain. He looked over his shoulder to see a certain blonde glaring down at him.

"This headband," he started with a growl, pointing at said headwear with his right thumb, "Is not a collectable. It is a grave marker of my people. Where did you get it?"

"G-Go to hell!" Hock spat defiantly. The blonde's lips curled up into a cruel smirk and he bent over to grab the leg he was on, gripping it by the ankle.

"There are, on average, nearly two-hundred and six bones in the human male body," Naruto said in a dark lecturing tone, "Your tibias are now broken in half. You were lucky."

"Lucky? Let me go you goddamn bastard and I'll show you who the fuck is lucky!" Hock snarled with narrowed eyes before he howled in pain again, only this time it was because of the blonde's sudden snapping of his ankle.

"Two hundred and four are now left. I know every placement. Tell me what I want to know," Naruto demanded. Hock glared at him and spat in his face. The shinobi from the past sighed and dropped the leg.

"Something more...closer then," Naruto mused as he nudged Hock onto his back with a light kick, stomping on the man's left shoulder with his left foot while grabbing Hock's arm with his right hand, "Dislocation is nearly as painful as breaking a bone."

"You don't have the balls," Hock sneered. The blonde hummed before smirking again and pulling out a kunai.

"No, but I do know that I'm not the best field medic...so try not to bleed out too fast, okay?" he asked cheerfully before kneeling on the man and starting to slowly saw through his body with the worn blade. Hock screamed when his skin was pierced two inches deep. At the quarter marker, the man's voice was shriller. Halfway through, he broke.

"THE BROKER! I GOT IT FROM THE BROKER!" shrieked the weapons dealer. Naruto paused and hummed before nodding once to himself.

"I'll buy that..." He said before stabbing the man through the gaping cut he had left in the shoulder wound, "Don't move."

"Wh-What? AHHHHHH!" Hock screamed as Naruto ripped the arm off of his body. The blonde tossed the arm over the edge and quickly performed the hand seals required for a fire technique, using said technique to cauterize the wound and keep him from bleeding out.

"Cross me or my friends again, Hock, and I'll kill you..._slowly_," Naruto snarled, making the man look at him fearfully, "Get me?"

"Y-Y-Y-Yes...Yes, sir..." the man weakly replied before passing out from the trauma. Little did he know that Naruto was keeping him conscious through constant chakra feeding, a technique he had learned during the break after the Fourth Shinobi War. Naruto shook his head and stood, wincing when the most recent clone memory hit him.

"I really should rein them in..." he mused before turning around to face a pissed off Kasumi, "Hey Kat-chan...those clones sure are rude huh?"

"...Get me back to the _Normandy_," she muttered before looking away. He would've commented on the pink tinge that covered her cheeks, but even he wasn't _that_ stupid...well, not anymore anyway.

"At once, Kasumi-chan," mock saluted the blonde with a small smile, relaxing the thief as he turned away to summon the awaiting shuttle that would return them to the Cerberus _Normandy_ SR-1. The thief looked over at the now one armed Hock with a scowl and moved towards him, only to be stopped by a sudden grip on her shoulder. Kasumi looked at the blonde, who was finishing contact with their ship's pilot before he spoke to her, "Let him rot."

"But he's not dead," Kasumi said with a frown, struggling to free herself, "Let me go, Naruto."

"No," the blonde sternly replied, his golden eyes glaring down at her obsidian ones, "I've taken his pride and arm. He's taken your lover. Let it die before you find yourself engulfed in a war you'll never win."

"You want me to walk away when Keiji-kun's killer is right there?" She asked with a hiss, "You're...You don't understand-!"

"I _DO_ understand!" Naruto shouted back, his eyes flashing red briefly. At her recoil, the blonde's hard stare softened before he spoke again, "You wanted answers, Kat-chan...? I'll give you my answers...if you leave _him_ be."

Kasumi bit her lip and looked over at the unconscious Hock. Even now, she could simply pull her pistol out and put one between his eyes. Only she and Naruto would know, and they'd be long gone before he was discovered. A sudden engine hum got her attention and she looked up as the white shuttle hovered overhead.

Naruto took her choice and hoisted her over his shoulder. She could've struggled, she could have screamed to be put down, but she didn't.

And her shot at revenge was gone.

**_Normandy's_ Com. Room, Widow Cluster, Year 2185~~**

"Shit...I'd have killed him, Jake," Jack said with a snort as she absentmindedly traced one of the tattoos adorning her left arm while the team was assembled. Subject Zero glanced at the now black and yellow wearing Biotic Cerberus member, who closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

"Yeah...but he wasn't worth the bullet," Jacob replied with a frown before looking at Miranda with a small smile, "Thanks...Thanks again, Miranda..."

"For what?" Miranda asked with a frown, "Your father was a monster at the end, and you could've gone on without knowing."

"But you gave him closure," Naruto pointed out from his spot seated on the wall behind Kasumi, earning everyone's attention, "And you kept him from making a mistake against his psyche, Shepard. My respect for you rises every day!"

The Spectre smirked and crossed his arms while leaning back, taking in Kasumi's new maroon attire before he asked the inevitable, "So...Did you get that thing, Kasumi?"

Kasumi blinked for a moment before nodding, "Yes...I, I got Keiji-kun's box...It was a memory implant grey box...I destroyed it."

Naruto frowned and sighed, wondering if he should have stayed behind to help her through it. She requested that he left though, probably because of her anger at being denied vengeance, but he'll be damned if he lets her become like the Uchiha.

"Hey Whiskers," Jack spoke up, jarring the blonde from his dark memories, "What's with the headband?"

Naruto blinked, mimicking Kasumi, before he dropped to the floor and walked out of the room quietly. At the door, he paused and looked over his shoulder with a face of a weary, war-torn young man, making a good portion of those gathered concerned, before he spoke softly, "It was my godfather's..."

Shepard, who had known just how long the blonde had been alive (by technicalities of course), sputtered and barely restrained himself from falling over. He furrowed his brow before the blonde left in a swirl of leaves, knowing that the Merc had left behind one of his duplications amongst them, before sighing and running a hand down his face, "EDI, make a note to remind me to contact Anderson...I need to talk to him..."

"_Of course, Shepard. Anything else?_" asked the AI.

"No," replied the Spectre before looking around the room, "Now...the meeting is adjourned. We set for Illium at 0800 so I want everyone to be well rested for the jump. You especially Miranda. Dismissed."

* * *

><p><strong>AN: ...It's official. MASS EFFECT 3 IS <strong>_**BOSS**_**! I refuse to give spoilers, and for those of you boycotting the game (why you would is insulting), you're missing out. Swallow your pride and go get it! Anyway, Naruto and Miranda re-team up on Illium with Shepard next chapter. Thane and Samara's recruitment is next...oh man I can't wait!**

**REVIEW MY LOYAL DRONES! REVIEW!**


	6. Chapter 6

**~Main Docks, Illium, Year 2185~**

* * *

><p>"So tell me again, Shepard, why did we bring this buffoon with us?" Miranda asked the commander as her patience started to wear thin. The strawberry blonde sighed at her question while the golden-eyed blonde from another era growled.<p>

"Hey, I didn't ask to come along! Hell, I would have perfectly fine to stay on the ship and try to get Kat-chan to talk to me again, but _no-o-o_," Naruto drawled the word out as he pouted childishly, "_Mom_ wanted to keep an eye on me after hearing about what I did to Hock, despite the fact he was a bastard."

"I don't need you accidentally blowing a hole in the trash compactor when you try and recreate another biotic attack," Shepard said with an annoyed tone, "That, and I was sure that Joker would have killed you if I hadn't gotten you off the ship."

"I still can't believe you tried to recreate the Biotic Pull right by the airlock," Miranda idly commented, "If it weren't for the fact I knew you personally, I would be amazed.

"So you'll leave EDI to take the venting anger, huh? How nice of you, Shep," Naruto grunted out while ignoring Miranda as he looked around the shopping center. The blonde merc paused when he saw an Asari standing off to the side trying to catch the attention of one of their group. Curious, Naruto slipped away while Shepard and Miranda continued to meet Miranda's contact.

"Hello there miss," the merc greeted cheerfully when he appeared at her side. The Asari, unprepared for a sudden appearance, jumped at his words before putting a hand over her chest to calm herself down. _Must have some human genes in her,_ Naruto thought before he continued, "Sorry about Shep's attitude. He's kind of got this thing called a one-track mind. Not his fault, really. He had a bad accident a few years ago. Can I help you?"

"Uh, I...I don't..." the Asari started before her eyes rolled into her head and a dual voice came from her mouth, "_Yes. Message for Shepard:_ _We hide; we burrow; we build, but we know you seek the ones that assaulted our Mothers. When the time comes, our voice will join with yours. And our crescendo will burn the darkness clean. Thank you, Shepard. The Rachni will sing again._"

Naruto's eyes widened and then narrowed as the Asari fell unconscious into his arms. The blonde carefully sat the woman on a bench to make it look like she fell asleep before he walked away. Outwardly, he was calm and cool, but on the inside, his mind was running at thousands of miles an hour. Shepard had met Rachni? Where? When? Weren't they extinct? Why hadn't he been told? Did he tell the council? Where were they located?

_It's times like these that I wish I had learned the mind scanning technique when Ino offered,_ mentally grumbled the blonde as he searched for a certain green armored human. Oh, how he and Shepard were going to have words.

* * *

><p>"Thanks Lanteia," Miranda said as she and Shepard left the bar, the raven-haired biotic then looked to the Spectre, "We have to hurry, I-Wait...Is it me, or are we short one idiot?"<p>

"What do you mean?" Shepard asked before looking around for Naruto. Hanging his head with a sigh, Shepard gestured for Miranda to follow him, "Let's go find our merc."

"Oh, there's no need," Naruto said coolly as he emerged from the shadows of the bar, startling a few patrons and making one toss a full glass over his shoulder before he left. The blonde's eyes were a burning red and slitted, drawing both Miranda's and Shepard's attention. A scowl crossed his face as soon as they did, "We need to talk."

"You're right. Naruto, I can't have you-Grk!" A hand wrapping around his throat cut off Shepard's scolding. A growl came from Naruto and his grip slowly tightened. Miranda had taken aim with her M-5 pistol at the blonde merc's head.

"Drop him, Naruto," the biotic ordered sternly as her eyes narrowed.

"Back off, Princess!" Naruto snarled as he snapped his gaze in her direction. For one of the few moments in her life, Miranda felt fear as his blood red eyes bored holes in her skull. The weapon in her hand trembled ever so slightly and a brief image of her father slitting her throat went through her head.

Naruto's ruby eyes slowly went back to Shepard's grey, before he growled, "Rachni. Where are they?"

"W-What are you talking about?" Shepard asked through a gasp. Naruto snarled and tossed Shepard through a nearby table. The Spectre groaned before he was pulled back to his feet by a strong grip on his jaw. The blonde shinobi hoisted Shepard into the air.

"Don't lie to me!" he snarled, "There was an Asari by the shops with a message from Rachni! How do you know about them? What do you know? WHAT AREN'T YOU TELLING ME?"

"I-It wash t-two yearsh ago!" Shepard managed to get out past Naruto's hand. The merc's eyes narrowed and the strawberry blonde continued, "Sharen captured a hibernating Queen and forced her to breed. I shtopped the breeding but...I couldn't kill the Queen."

"You let it live?" Naruto asked, nostrils flaring, "You...You stupid FUCK!"

Shepard dropped to the ground abruptly before Naruto kicked him in the chest. The attack put Shepard through a wall, startling a private party as he landed on their table, causing it to collapse and dump their drinks on the Spectre. The bar had gotten quiet enough that Shepard could barely make out the soft thumps Naruto made as he approached. A hand grabbed his armor's collar and Shepard was pulled back to his feet once again.

"That's your one warning, Shepard," Naruto snarled, "You keep something like this from me again and I'll kill you. Saving the Universe be damned."

Shepard merely groaned, "Gotcha...no secrets...Wanna go help my XO out? Miranda's still frozen."

The blonde looked back to the Biotic, who was in fact still staring blankly ahead where Naruto once stood, before snorting, "Nah...she'll be fine. That wasn't even all my killing intent."

_Not all his what?_ Shepard mused as he regained his bearings once Naruto set him down. The strawberry blonde rubbed a small dent on the collar and looked back to the merc. Said merc's eyes had become golden once more, lacking a single hint of red. Weird.

Looking around him, Shepard gaped when there was no structural damage. Glancing at himself, he noted that he didn't see a single drop of any foreign liquid. When he looked back up to ask Naruto what he did, the blonde was in front of Miranda, waving his hand in front of her eyes.

"Huh, she really is out of it," the blonde murmured in a thoughtful tone, "People are much more susceptive to genjutsu under KI. Good to know."

"What was that?" Shepard asked once he regained his voice, "Naruto, explain!"

"Maa, calm down," Naruto said with a wave of disinterest while he scrutinized Miranda's still frozen face, "Just a small genjutsu with a bit of force at the end. Everything you just experience was a lie, well, except when I grabbed your collar. I actually did that."

"How did...No, wait, I don't think I want to know," Shepard said as he approached his frozen XO, "What did you _do_ to her?"

"Nothing...Say, think she'd look good with a moustache?" Naruto asked as he pulled a black marker out. Shepard stared at him with an impassive face, making Naruto pout, "Killjoy. You're lucky I'm not _really_ angry with you anymore. Well, the fact that I got lost like five times before I confronted you helps with that. I got to cool down. Still, I needed answers and my acting is top notch."

With a twitching eye, Shepard pointed at Miranda, "Fix. Now."

"..._Fine_!" the merc, whose sanity was being questioned by Shepard, childishly relented. He walked around to Miranda's side, pulled his hand back, and then swung it at her rear, exclaiming, "What an ass!"

The Cerberus agent yelped and her hands instinctively went to her rear. Swiveling around with her pistol ready, she felt her face redden when Naruto grinned at her.

"Yeah, that happened. No, I'm not sorry. No, I can't promise I won't do it again. And yes, you can touch mine."

Shepard stared in shock at the man, now certain that he had a death wish, before reaching up and activating his headset, contacting the Normandy's AI.

"_Yes Commander?_"

"I'm gonna need Garrus out here, EDI."

"_Shepard, your own instructions dictate that only a minimum party of three can leave the ship at a single stop._"

"Yeah, I know. Naruto will be returning to the ship shortly. I want him quarantined in his room."

"_Did Naruto contract a disease?_"

"...You could say that."

* * *

><p>"I can't believe Shepard had you quarantine me!" Naruto cried out as he pressed some medi-gel to his swollen eye. Oddly enough, Miranda reverted to some sort of female instinct and <em>threw<em> her pistol at his face with a biotic Throw. He woke up with sore ribs and a black eye. Thankfully, his balls were still attached. How, he didn't know, but he wasn't exactly complaining.

"_Well if you hadn't provoked Executive Officer Lawson you wouldn't be in this situation,_" EDI replied. VI Kichi nodded his head in agreement from where he sat in front of the blonde.

"_Yeah! Niisan shouldn't have pissed off Neechan!_" Kichi stated 'helpfully' before looking to the door, "_Visitor_."

"Thanks, Kichi," Naruto grunted as his door was pounded on, "I can't exactly open it from in here!"

The door opened to reveal a disgruntled Jacob, earning an arched brow from the merc. The Biotic entered with arms crossed, followed by a smirking Jack, who elected a grin from the blonde. Jack matched his grin and asked, "So...Was it worth it?"

"Totally," Naruto quipped without shame before he looked at Jacob, "I can guess why Jack's here, but you? You suddenly grow a distaste for the Cheerleader, too?"

"No," Jacob grunted before crossing his arms and looking away, "Orders from Shepard. He wants us to go meet with one of the possible teammates. The sooner we recruit, the sooner we can kick Collector ass."

"Oh...Okay!" Naruto said, hopping to his feet with a grin. A long silence passed before Naruto broke it while frowning, "Well, you're in charge, aren't ya?"

Jacob narrowed his eyes and asked, "And if I am?"

"I was waiting for a debriefing," Naruto replied, "What should I bring and what not. Should I wear heavier armor? Maybe bring multiple thermo clips? Perhaps I should pack some condoms? How many knives should I prepare? Should I pack explosive tags? Will I need my breathing mask?"

"Wait, wait, wait..." Jacob said with a hand held up before his brown eyes narrowed on the blonde, "What was the third thing?"

"How many knives I need?" Naruto asked innocently. Jacob's eye twitched while Jack snorted.

"No...The thing before that," Jacob slowly grit out.

"Thermo clips?" the blonde suggested far too innocently to be sincere. Jack bit down on one of her knuckles to keep from laughing when she took note of Jacob's growing irritation.

Accepting defeat, the Biotic threw his hands up and left the room, calling back over his shoulder, "Just be ready to go back to Illium in ten!"

The door slid shut behind him and the two remaining occupants of the room exchanged a glance before bursting into laughter. When she calmed down enough, Jack snickered out, "Damn, man, you're suicidal today! What's next, you gonna smack Garrus across the face with your dick?"

"Nah, I'll wait until his birthday for that," Naruto chuckled out before sighing and becoming somber, "I...Learned something interesting today. Interesting...and upsetting. I'm still trying to come to terms with it, so don't ask, ok?"

"Like I would ask you what crawled up your ass," Jack replied before holding her chin, "Unless...you're into that sort of thing..."

With a mock gasp, Naruto dramatically put a hand over his mouth in shock, "How did you know? You asked Kat-chan about the banana incident, didn't you? It was one time, I tell you!"

Jack laughed and held her gut, "Ah man...don't ever change, Whiskers."

With a content smile, Naruto replied, "Not planning on it, Jack."

* * *

><p>"I'm going to throttle him," Miranda grumbled as they rode on the transport to the far side of Illium, "In his sleep!"<p>

"Geez, I know he smacked your ass but surely you're not really going to kill him, right?" Garrus asked, looking at the woman. Taking note of the colder than normal glare being sent his way, the Turian quickly looked away and rubbed his scarred mandible, "Or you might, what do I know?"

"Cool off, Miranda," Shepard ordered with a sigh before looking at Garrus, "You read up on the debriefing?"

"What am I, a newborn? Yes, I read the debriefing," Garrus snorted as he pulled his Mantis out along with a cleaning rag to ensure the scope was clear, "I'll provide cover while you and Miss Personality here get her sister back. I'm starting to wonder if Naruto wasn't wrong about you being a mother hen, Shepard."

With a twitching eye, the Spectre asked, "What, is he on your 'good' side again?"

"Far from it, but I did get a email from Cherry from a Citadel address explaining everything," the former vigilante sighed, "Still doesn't make up for the fact he ditched us without so much as a goodbye. And honestly, it's fricken hard trying to stay mad at the guy when he gives you so much evidence not to...unless you're a woman that is. I think Miranda's like...the ninety-second on the list of females out to kill him."

"Maybe we should tell them that Naruto is working for the Collectors," Shepard mused jokingly, "That'd get us an army that would certainly win."

Garrus chuckled, "Yeah, but the second they see my face they might get distracted."

"You mean on account of how ugly you are?" the Spectre asked with a smirk. Garrus scoffed.

"You, my friend, are not one to talk about ugly," the Turian shot back. Before Shepard could reply, his Omni-tool beeped with an incoming message.

"_Commander, Officer Taylor wanted to inform you that he, Naruto and Jack were going to recruit The Assassin. He also wants me to tell you that, quote, "If you do this to me again, I'm going to shove a Bio-Grenade down your throat!" End quote. Response?_" EDI asked.

Garrus snickered and Miranda smirked while Shepard sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose. At this rate, his own team would kill each other before the Collectors did. Their transport slowly came to a stop and Shepard sent a reply, "Tell Jacob that I'll make it up to him somehow and please ask Naruto to behave."

"You should've sent Mordin to keep an eye on them, Shepard," Garrus said with a smirk.

Shepard sighed again, feeling older than he should, before he replied, "Mordin is not as capable of leading as you'd think, Garrus. He's too absentminded sometimes and too focused at others. Giving him command over Jack and Naruto would be like signing Illium a death warrant."

The Turian smirked, "Oh come on, give him a chance. He can't be that bad...right?"

* * *

><p>Back on the Normandy, Mordin was poking and prodding at Grunt's arm, "Interesting. Higher regeneration. Thicker skin. Hm. Perhaps a increase of hormones? No, no, too risky. Would've made too uncontrollable. DNA manipulation? No. Wanted perfect Krogan. Too different wouldn't be perfect. Unless...Ah-ha!"<p>

"Figure something out, Doc?" Grunt asked. The whole reason he was here was to find out what made him different from other Krogans. The Tank didn't say much about how he was different, only how he should act. And like any sentient being, Grunt was curious about his origins. Hence, why he was in the research lab with Mordin.

"Yes! Naruto's Perfect Ramen Recipe!" Mordin replied as he dashed to a computer and pulled up a holoscreen, "Too much salt. Needs less sodium to be nutritious. Hm. How to fix? Create healthy replacement? No, not enough materials."

Grunt growled, "You're working on the runt's cookbook? What the Hell?"

"Also thinking of Krogan physiology. Reverse engineering Collector weapon. Cure for humanity's common cold, tricky, but close to solution," Mordin replied before looking at him, "Have all I need. You can go."

Grunt gaped at the Salarian before said scientist shooed him out of the labs. Grunt looked back at the shut door before he looked to where EDI had popped up and asked, "Are all Salarians like that? The Tank said they were inquisitive and intellectual, but Mordin..."

"_Thankfully, Doctor Solus is a rare case of Salarian genius. A quote dumb unquote Salarian acts about as normal as Mr. Monroe,_" EDI said. An outraged cry came from the cockpit. Grunt gave a small grin.

"Naruto is rubbing off on you," he noted with a smirk before there was a muted boom coming from the labs behind him. Curious and maybe a _tad_ concerned for his Salarian comrade, Grunt reentered the lab to find a slightly charred Mordin standing in front of a smoking pot.

"Ah, note. Salarian mucus and Paracetamol are highly explosive when combined. Might make a good replacement for semtex. Should probably patent. Ah, Grunt. Please take me to Dr. Chakwas." With that, the Salarian fell forwards onto the floor. Grunt scratched his crown before grabbing the lizard-like alien and throwing him over his shoulder, doing as he asked. Not because he was asked, but because Shepard needed Mordin.

* * *

><p>Naruto suddenly stopped walking and looked back towards the Normandy with a brow arched, "I think someone I know was talking about someone else I know, causing said someone else to sneeze. Man, I miss everything!"<p>

"Knock it off!" Jacob ordered as their escort led them into Liara T'Soni's office. The Asari scholar in question had just hung up her phone before looking at them.

Smiling gently, earning a light blush from Jacob, Liara asked, "So, you're Shepard's comrades?"

"That's right, Miss-" "What! Liara-chan, you know Shepard, too? Why doesn't anyone tell me these things!" Naruto's question cut Jacob off. Both Biotics stared at the merc as he rushed around the Asari's desk and wrapped her in a hug.

"F-Fox? Fox! Where've you been?" Liara asked with a smile as she returned the hug, "It's been a while, hasn't it?"

"Six months, twenty days, and one hour...now," Naruto said after he broke the hug and stepped back, before pouting once again, "Why didn't you didn't tell me you knew Shepard?"

Liara's smile strained slightly and she looked away, "It...wasn't important at the time. I thought he was dead."

"He's looking pretty good for a dead man," the blonde commented before smacking his hand to his headband, "Oh! Where are my manners? Liara, Officer Jacob Taylor and 'Subject Zero' Jack. Jacob, Jack, meet Liara T'Soni. My last employer before Shepard picked me up."

"Well, isn't that ironic," Jacob hummed with crossed arms. Jack tossed a light Push at Naruto, who ducked and allowed the attack to shatter a window.

"Don't call me that, Whiskers," Jack warned. Naruto chuckled uneasily before looking at an amused Liara.

"Sorry 'bout the window...again..." he sheepishly admitted with a shrug before grinning, "Hey, after I'm done with this recruitment thing, you wanna grab a drink?"

"Unfortunately, I'll have to decline," the Asari sighed out, "I have too much work that has to be done, and originally I allowed this appointment to see Shepard."

"What, I'm chopped liver? After all the things we did? Huh, great to know where I stand, Liara-chan," Naruto muttered with a frown. Liara blushed and looked down before coughing to clear the slowly rising confusion in the air. The three members of the _Normandy_'s crew looked at her as she donned a mask of content.

"_Anyway_," the Asari said, "You want to know where this 'Assassin' is? Well, all I can say is that the Drell you're looking for made contact with one of the cargo transfer officers. I believe her name is Seryna."

"Thank you," Jacob said with a nod, turning to leave, "Let's go."

Naruto watched Jack and Jacob leave before looking at Liara with hardened eyes, "I found it."

Liara's eyes widened, "How? My sources are still looking."

"I know, but your sources were never hired by SB," the blonde mercenary replied before slipping her a data chip, "Everything you need to know is right here. If you need our help, just ask Shepard or I when we show up again."

"Thank you, Fox," Liara said as she held the chip and scrutinized it. A brief silent moment passed before she realized what he said and looked up, "Wait, what do you mean...?"

The blonde was no where in sight, making the Asari sigh and put her hand on her cheek, "Dammit...I hate it when he does that."

* * *

><p>"So, you and T'Soni have a...<em>history<em> do you?" Jack asked as they walked towards the cargo transfer area. The woman was curious about their Mercenary partner, as was about everyone else on the ship that didn't already know him. Jacob, while trying to remain professional and keep from showing his distaste for mercs in general, listened in hope that he would get something on the blonde.

"Yeah, Liara-chan and I did some pretty crazy things. Man, bureaucracy has become even more violent since I was a kid," Naruto mused. The two took no notice of his slight slip. Jack frowned when she realized he didn't recognize her teasing.

"No, you idiot, I want to know about your _history_ with T'Soni!" she told him. Naruto gave the Biotic a confused glance.

"She hired me to take out a few un-cooperating clients and look up some info on others," Naruto replied with an arched brow, "Why do you want to know that so much?"

"She's asking you if you and T'Soni had sex, you dumbass," Jacob spat, unable to keep quiet much longer. Naruto blinked and brushed the insult off like dust.

"Maa, no need to be so angry about it, Taylor. And if you wanted to know, just ask," Naruto said to Jack. He then continued to walk silently with his hands in his pockets and not a care in the world. Jack and Jacob both stopped and stared at his still walking form.

"...Hey, is he doing this on purpose or is he completely serious right now?" Jacob asked after a moment.

"I have no fucking idea," Jack replied as she shook her head, "Whiskers! Wait the fuck up!"

Naruto stopped and looked back at the two Biotics with a smile. Unknown to them, he had understood what Jack was asking from the first time and successfully took control of the conversation. With someone like Shepard, that wouldn't have been possible, but these two, who were more interested in things other than the long term goals that Shepard has, were so easy to manipulate it was kind of sad. He could understand though, both were filled to the brim with anger, Jacob at the fact that he had to deal with not one, but two mercenaries, and Jack because, well, Jack is Jack.

"What, did you two get distracted by my fine ass?" Naruto asked with an arched brow, "Let's go grab this Assassin. I made a bet with Grunt that we'd beat Shepard back to the _Normandy_."

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Hi ho. Yeah, started playing ME2 again so...expect more updates. BTW, still love ME3, haters can SUCK IT.<strong>

**Taichou is coming along slowly...**

**Review if you want a faster update!**


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